The "how" of things

It is not what we teach, but how we teach that made the greatest difference to our children.

A newfound wisdom came from a mother of two children, who told me the above. I had gone to her house to do a maths intervention programme for my master's research paper, and the methods that I used made her rethink the ways that she had been teaching mathematics to her children. It was an awakening for her. As for me, it was the stamp of approval that what I was doing was perhaps the better way of teaching mathematics to very young children.

It may not be the absolute way or the school-approved way, but the "how" is very important when we teach young children. You can get the child to add 2 + 2 using worksheets, or you can play a game of two dices and get the child to add the two numbers when the two dices are thrown. That made a whole world of difference to the child and to the mom. And it is probably one of the best ways to teach young children to love and appreciate maths, and ultimately score in maths.

The "how" of things crept up again when I was revisiting a research project that I was involved some years earlier. This time, it was a father of three children who was reminiscing about his childhood - a childhood that he would remember albeit with a bit of bitterness and grief. When he did not do well in his exams, his own father would be disappointed and told him to study harder. But he does not know how to study harder. "How" does one study harder to get better grades when one is not being shown, or demonstrated or have a role model to emulate? This made the father more adamant that he will show the "how" to do things to his own kids and not simply just telling them what to do. He said that it is akin to telling your young child to read, and yet you yourself do not read to your own child, or teach him how to read. That will be disastrous in itself.

I've seen the ad many times in the paper, about some accelerated program that promised to make a difference to your child's grades, of course with improved grades and not vice versa. I've spoken to the founder once, and somehow I decided to attend her free seminar and see for myself what exactly is this program all about. Again, what I felt she is telling to her potential clients is - it is not what we teach, but how we teach - that could make or break a child's grades and esteem. We can study so very hard and for very long hours, but if we do not have the right method or technique of learning, it may just go to waste as we will not produce the kind of results that we wanted. According to her, our human brain is only using less than 5% of the potential it can reap. She does make sense especially to parents who do not understand that it is important to show your child the better way to learn. Show, not just say. Saying the wrong words may ultimately do more damage to your child than you think.

I didn't sign up for my child because eventhough she claimed she will impart 8 different ways of learning, at least I think I may have two or three of the "hows" in my pocket for my kid. That will be enough for now. And if my "hows" are not working for my child, I'll find out more "hows" for him in the future.