Best chances of a second one...?

I was reading with much amusement an article written by a gynaecologist a few days ago in the local Malay papers. He is a Muslim male. His article was about couples having trouble conceiving the second child or having trouble conceiving at all. And these couples have seek his advice on what should be done. Unless it was just pure fatigue, he felt that there is no need to see him. What needs to be done is to just do it. One wife actually told the husband that he (the gynae) had adviced doing it everyday until the husband felt extremely stressed and exhausted. The gynae was shocked to hear that he had dispense such an advice, only to realise that the wife had been smiling gleefully in the corner. This gynae's formula instead is to have the sex-relax-sex-relax method, which means doing it every alternate days for best chances of conceiving. But of course, he added, no one will stop you if you wishes to do it everyday. He ends off with this phrase Biar penat asalkan jangan tenat! Not so literal translation :- Never mind tired, as long as not punctured!

Oh hubby....

It's my wedding anniversary...(and I haven't learned)

Today (7 Nov 2006)marks my seventh year wedding anniversary, but it was a working day for hubby. And a regular day of me being a seri rumahtangga. Yes, a seri rumahtangga not suri rumahtangga and I doubt that you could find the word in the dictionary because it was coined by moi.

Back to the anniversary, eventhough hubby suggested we go out for dinner, I was not too keen as it would feel like any other dinners that we had to have. Unless of course, he had planned a romantic dinner for two with candlelights and scented aromas, with beautiful live music of violins, perhaps at the rooftop...hmmm, only in my dreams of now. I got him a card, a romantic card that pledges my vow to him, ehem, and of course a present - a pair of black pants that he needed badly because he does not have one. But I was illusioned to think that he was still a size 34. He had grown to 36. Therefore I have to get it changed. I prepared dinner of sirloin steak and fresh salad at home with leftovers of mashed potato and mushroom sauce. Of course hubby apologised that he hadn't had the time to get me something, anything. Not that I want to, but only if he could have thought about it and got something much earlier. You know, men, or rather this hubby of mine, is someone you need to tell upfront, straight into his face, that you want flowers, roses or diamonds, then he will get it for you (well maybe not that last item starting with the letter d). Otherwise, if you said, it's ok, nevermind dear, it's really ok, it's not that important, no, I don't want anything - then he will NOT get anything. Period. I wished men, or rather, this hubby of mine would not take me too literally here. Serve me right for not learning my lesson all these years.

Salam Aidilfitri

by afzalmom
Afzal donning the latest invention for this festive season, the "songkok lap-lip" (glitterati headgear).

Here's wishing family, friends and online buddies a Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri and Maaf Zahir dan Batin. May you have a blessed year ahead.

Recollections from the past

The same time last year, we spent Ramadan in Alabama. The difference were many. As perhaps usual for Muslims fasting in a non-Muslim country, we did not hear any form of Azan to signify the breaking of fast unlike here in Singapore where everyone would tune in to Radio Warna for that significant moment. What we had was a printout of the solat times that includes imsak from the local mosque, and we rely on that religiously.

We did not break fast with family members. It was a rather quiet Ramadan, breaking fast with hubby alone. And when hubby is on night shift, it would just be me. We hadn't train Afzal then to fast, and usually he would have had his dinner by then. This was something I missed most.

One major difference would be the fact that during buka, it was my home-cooked meals daily. Unlike here, there were no visits to any bazaars for any Ramadan specialty. Though we did not really crave for anything special, I remembered the nasi ambeng at the Jurong West bazaar and the bubur masjid plus air kathira. And hubby remembered this one food that he would usually have once during Ramadan which he did not get a taste of it at all last year - bubur sum sum. Up till today which is already 23 days of fasting, hubby already had his bubur sum sum, and I still hadn't got my nasi ambeng from that Jurong West bazaar.

This year, our break fast were mostly outside or at our parent's home with the exception for a few days that I cook that I could count with one hand alone.

There are other things that I knew I wanted to do during Ramadan, but somehow, never get around to doing it. And these are important things I feel for my own personal and spiritual development. But what I fear is I may get lost again in this world-chasing thing or in this hurried lifestyle that I'm having which I know is not an excuse for my own inadequacy and lack of effort on my part.

Oh Allah swt, give me strength, give me your mercy and give me your compassion for I'm such an inadequate being of yours.

I write but that does not make me a writer

For the first time, I was officially known as a writer. That was about two months back when I decided to decline the offer to produce and direct a tv programme but instead, to write.

Rather than sounding a tad arrogant when some may consider my decision to write instead of produce/ direct a sheer waste of talent, I believe this decision has a lot to do with my phase in life. And writing, is a talent to be nurtured as well. Just because I write, that does not make me a writer. My hats off to tv writers and other writers alike especially these two I know, Hamed Ismail and Amanah Mustafi for having the tenacity and brain power to churn scripts on a daily basis.

My decision to even get one foot back into the broadcasting world is one of mixed feelings. It's something that I have done for over a decade and therefore I can be considered almost a veteran in this area but never an expert. I learnt from phD holders, that no one is an expert in something. There is always something new to learn in a profession that you are so used and accustomed to. And though I feel I could start to pursue a new career path like early childhood, I do feel lacking in expertise in this new area as well.

So I hang on, waiting, or rather just passing by, till I feel my son is going to primary school before I embark on a new path, but then again, only time will tell. At least an incident in the broadcasting world recently had revived in me one of the many reasons why I left the industry in the first place.

It's an interesting and dynamic place to be with a lot of avenues for creative juices to flow but sometimes it's the people that really suck the blood out of you. People who shamelessly think that they are mightier than thou just because they are in a so-called 'higher' or 'clientele' position, working with people who are "anal" in many ways and yet doesn't know it, working with people with mindsets, a mindset that they think others have not change and evolve with the times and yet their own mindset has not change and evolve as well. People who are just plain pure rude, wicked, who thinks they are glamorous, "serpent beneath the rose types" blah, blah, blah and ...all sorts. Astaghfirullahallazim, pardon me Allah, for I am fasting. And please protect me from these people, because sometimes I feel they make me a bad person, but I know I have the choice not to be one. So help me. Amin

I write, for the sake of writing.

Driving me crazy

It's been a week of lots of driving. Yes, I have the car all to myself because hubby is not around. And there I go, zipping from east to west to central to west and back to east and further east etc. Unlike when I take a taxi, driving requires some kind of mental checklist, especially if I'm going to an untrodden route. However, with a kid in tow, and having to go to "work", it seems that the night before I will go through my mental checklist of what I should do first, and where to go.

So it could be
1) drive to a breakfast stop (must decide where or within the route I'm going)
2) eat or buy breakfast so that the lil' one is full and will not be cranky
3) send to mother-in-law's place (which will be PIE from east all the way to Pioneer Rd)
4) Or send to mum's place (which will be PIE exit from Eunos all the way to Tampines)
5) Take the PIE route to "work"
6) Go back take PIE to either Pioneer Rd or Tampines depending where the lil' one is. Sometimes another pitstop to get dinner, a bit of groceries/emergencies or fill up the tank.
7) On selected days, take the lil one to his enrichment classes.
8) Drive back PIE to home.

On certain days, I may have to go to some untrodden route or my not-so-usual path like Syed Alwi Road or Pandan Road, that's when I had to get the directory to decide whether to hit the PIE or ECP or otherwise. If I'm not stuck in a traffic jam for some reason, I will get lost.

But this particular experience differs from the usual and I hope it is not an experience to be repeated again. *Pray*

I remembered the first time when hubby left for Alabama and I had the car all to myself. I was driving along PIE from Tampines to Jalan Bahar in the morning rush hour. Afzal was with me because I had to send him to the work childcare and then head off for work. And my car just went dead on the PIE somewhere before Adam Road exit, in the morning rush hour. Yes, with loads of cars behind, in front and around me rushing for work and my car went dead in the middle of the PIE. I could not start the car, and nervous beads of perspiration were raining on my forehead. It did not help that Afzal was wailing in fear of the situation. The car behind honked but he stopped, and he was kind enough to go out of his car to see what happened to mine. He could not start my car either. I wanted to go out of the car, but my son was wailing again. I was embarrassed, shocked and nervous all rolled into one. Frankly speaking, I did not know what to do and wished hubby had been around, not only in my car but in Singapore, that is at that time.

The guy whose car was behind me suggested I called my tow-truck company but before I knew it another tow-truck came. There's so many cctv cameras on PIE, so the LTA will send one tow-truck out should they see a car in distress. We were towed all the way to Adam Road food centre. A distressed mum will be further distressed with a distressed son. So the pakcik tow-truck actually help to carry Afzal to his truck and comfort him until we land safely on Adam Road food centre car park.

That was a nightmare!

The nature of things

My little boy turned six yesterday. It was a quiet celebration at Swensen, with lunch and ice-cream. Well, at least the staff there sang him a birthday song and his two uncles joined us as well. Nenek and datuk were holidaying in Melbourne, but they called in the morning to wish him together with his Aunty Yan and Uncle Nazif. Afzal received a Black Widow water gun from his youngest uncle Suffian.

Since we received two complimentary tickets from his uncle Ayom to the Kids Central Live Show on 31 Aug,we went - only Afzal and mummy, sharing a special time together.

Today, we were at the airport bidding his daddy farewell. Daddy left for US again but this time to Illinois for the next three weeks. After that, mummy brought Afzal to the Kids Central Carnival because the tickets were still valid since it rained heavily the last time. On the way home, we stopped at the coffeeshop beside Kassim Mosque and bought packed dinner. Afzal wanted briyani.

Mummy and Afzal shared a packet of chicken briyani and mummy felt like drinking soda. So mummy relented and shared soda together with the big little boy.

Now, While Afzal is occupying himself with his new remote control car from his Aunt Midah, mummy is feeling blue. Oh well, I will keep myself busy with work for next week while putting Afzal at mum-in-law's place. In this moment in time, that's the nature of things, I guess.

So how, brown cow? Don't shoot me if I'm wrong...

With the so many changes in the education system in Singapore, it makes me think that perhaps it's about time that the government acknowledges the diversity and the different gifts in each child. With all the talk about more concrete and experiential learning experience, smaller classroom size and niche programs in schools, many children will have their different potential(s) and diverse talent(s) realised. But shoot me if I'm wrong, things are not really changing.

An early childhood colleague once mentioned to me that it's not the fault of the schools, but it's parents who are pushing their children to the edge, and in return pushed the teachers and principals. And therefore, it has become imperative for schools to upkeep their standards, thus stressing the principals and the teachers.

Let's say she is right but for a start why aren't the principals and teachers embracing the changes first and then changing the mindset of parents? Otherwise, the old and unwanted effects will just continue.

Here's a little snippet of something of this thing called the primary school registration in this little island of Singapore.

When I say I wanted to send my child to school A, a parent told me that it is not a good school, and suggested that I should send my child to school B instead. According to her, the academic standard in school B is better and even if your child is not doing so well, this school B is affiliated to a secondary school and your child will still stand a chance of a secondary school. (Affiliations or not, I just hope that my son is capable to get into a secondary school with his own abilities.) She, however, sent her child to school C because it is a SAP primary school, so-called the best in that area. (I will never have a chance to send my child to school C, for obvious reasons that my child will not take Mandarin as a second language in school.)

On my part, I have checked out the nearest available schools via their internet, and I was more impressed with school A's website rather than school B. And of course, I have my own reasons why I think school A will be better for my son. But with some non-highly recommended comments about school A, I decided to check out school A myself and met with the school principal. How I wished he would dispel some myths about his school and welcome me and my child to his school with opens arms. He did dispel some myths but the meeting that followed was definitely not what I was expecting.

According to principal of school A, not verbatim, "Our school is doing very well, in fact, our academic is very rigorous, and if your child is not able to read and write by the time he is in primary one, he will struggle and it will be stressful for him."

According to principal of school A, "our school is better that school B, because the aggregate of our top PSLE student's last year was higher than school B and many other schools around the district. In fact, we are better than school B in all subjects except Mandarin."

He also reiterated the fact that students who enter his school are mostly readers and they fall in the 3-5 categories. He does not have students in the 0 and 1 categories, meaning non-readers. He mentioned again that "if parents are not involved in their children's education, it will be difficult for the child to progress in his school." (Get the hint).

Two things here.

1) The principal's facts and figures actually show you that you should not just listen to any parents without checking it out yourself. The truth is better than hearsay. Also, don't let other parents change what you have in mind because only you know your child better. Firstly ask yourself, what is a good school to you and to your child? For me, I will not put my child in schools where there are major disciplinary and attitudinal issues with the children. Other than that, I have some faith in MOE and NIE for having one of the best curriculums in the world and some of the finest teachers.

2) I am definitely an advocate for parent involvement, but to keep reiterating the fact that if my son is not able to read and write in primary one, I repeat again, read and write in primary one, he will definitely struggle. Isn't he, the school principal, pushing the parents' to the edge and in return the kids will be pushed by the parents and the cycle continues? So who is stressing who now?

And I thought the schools are changing to accomodate the different abilities in students.

So how, brown cow?

It is not related to history

I'm having this perpetual cough that never seems to subside after the flu bug hits me. I don't know what is it about me or the weather here in Singapore that this sinus-cough ailment is stuck to me like a bad sore. Taking over-the-counter cough syrup does not do me any good. I need stronger dosage so in other words again, maybe another visit to the doc. Somehow, for the one year we were in Alabama, my health was good. Afzal had fever twice, but he never had a bad cough attack that we needed to scramble for his puffs. Here, when his cough sounded really bad, it looks like he was about to 'choke.'

Some four plus years ago, at least once a month, Afzal would always need to see a doctor. At that time, we went to a GP. But after no improvement, I decided that we should see a paeditrician. At the PD, we were told then that Afzal had mild asthma, something which the GP had not mention. We were surprised and rather doubtful about the PD's diagnosis. "It can't be!" we thought, because both me and my husband's side of the families have no history of asthma. That first time, however, Afzal was given those masked oxygen to breathe in that PD's clinic. He had a different cough, cold and fever medication than the usual ones that we had from the GP, and the PD prescribed us his inhalers as well as the "rocket."

Back in our car, I hugged him and cried, and once again the many times that I had felt so helpless and like a failure for not being able to help him welled up inside me. It did not help when we told our parents who refused to believe that Afzal had mild asthma because "there is no history in both our families." It made me feel even worst, as I felt like I was being accused whether intentional or not that I did not know how and did not take good care of my own son.

Just to be sure, we went to another doctor and was told the same thing. In fact, he assured us it may not necessarily be 'history' related but if any of the parents have sinus or eczema problems, that could potentially be a cause for asthma. I know I have this sinus problem and hubby too. So we both accept the fact that both of us could cause Afzal's asthma so as to shoulder the guilt together. Again, to be sure, we visited another paeditrician for a third opinion, and the results have not changed since.

But Afzal has been better, and has never ever needed to rely on his inhalers 24/7. And we are so grateful for that.

Trying to get back the momentum

It's not easy to get back to the momentum of writing in blogs, and I have saved a postings as draft. I'll come back to that later, I thought, well maybe yes, maybe not.

Being in home ground perhaps, I feel rather mundane to talk about things that I do unlike being in a different country where you get to experience new things thus you talk and blog about it. For one, changes in my life are not interesting materials to report about. And how I wish I have the gift of the pen like some other bloggers who write poignant stories and personal political statements.

Firstly, where do I start?

I'll be back, soon, I hope.

Has anyone notice that...

...I have not updated this blog for the longest time ever? Or the subtle changes that I have made in "About Afzalmom" and the addition of the "new Singapore time clock". Still sentimental about deleting "Mobile, Al's clock". Anyway, I'll try my best to update and to friends that have kept me company during my 'very on' blogging days, please pardon me for this cessation in transmission but you are still being remembered always.

It bugs me

Barely three months we are back in Singapore, I have made the local doctors even richer by having three visits already...i'm so bugged with the flu bug. As a Taurean, it has been said that my sensitivities are around the ears, nose and throat regions. Oh well, how true, and it is so often that my throat is affected that everyone would say I have an ultra sexy voice (aka the frog's croak).

Last Saturday, I guessed my body went into shock and my system crashed. I think I have been out of the adrenaline-pumping-super-long-hours-live-tv-show for so long (2 years to be exact) that I suddenly went on overdrive...

The World Cup ...

... and the neglected wife.

It comes every four years, where the lure of men kicking one ball is better than s**, or so it seems. So for every significant other who is not interested in the game, this is the time where you will have the whole bed to yourself, while hearing occasional oohs and ahhs and indiscernable shouts and grunts from your spouse (and maybe others) from the living room.

Have I turned my back at the blogging world?

I really don't know and I don't have the answers right now.

Blogging came to me when I was 'alone', when hubby left for the States back in April 2005. Now I'm back in Singapore and I'm not 'alone' anymore eventhough hubby is back in Alabama again since May 15th. But at least now I have my family, friends, familiarity and things to keep me busy.

Until then. I don't know when. Maybe tomorrow...?

Ah Choo!!!!!

My morning sinus is back. My nose is red. My sweat glands work triple time. Extra showers everyday. I can't move at the supermarket, and my, the drivers here are really impatient.

Welcome back to my Singapore, my birth country.

5 boxes at parent's place and another 5 boxes at my mil's place.

Half unpacked.

So what's the future plan?

Still waiting for the news, so that I can take action of Plan A or B or maybe C. Is there a Plan C?

Afzal is not in school. Me teaching him a few minutes a day. Minutes not even an hour.

Want to send him for enrichment like golf or swimming or music, I've to wait for the news. Again. Incapacitated.

Ok maybe I'll call to ask.

The final leg

The luggages are packed, and the house is almost litter-free. I have to get rid of all the food from the fridge, cabinets, and even all the itsy-bitsy stuff that we have accumulated for the short span of 11-12 months.

Adem's mother have asked whether we have leftover groceries, and the groceries that we and the other Muslim families have not decided to bring back home amount to many boxfuls of unused and half-used items. She is fine with even half-used items because she says she trust us being Muslims. We also gave Adem a white board, a set of badminton racket with shuttlecocks and a small chair. All these were Afzal's stuff and Afzal was willing to let it go.

And we had our big and final dinner at Carrabba Italian Grill earlier today because I have "hung up my wok". However I still roast half a chicken tonight for something on the sky. Because most times the food provided by the North American airlines are not palatable at all.

I don't think I can sleep well tonight for I have so many thoughts racing in my mind. I'm afraid I may have forgot to pack some things. And true enough as I was typing this, I ran to my room and checked one of our drawers, and there are 4 newly bought watches that are happily sitting in the drawers! It was hubby's repsonsibility to pack them and it seems that it had slipped his mind. Kalau kita dah sampai Singapore, nangis tak berlagu nampaknya.

Needs to check and recheck. And so much trash to send to the dump too.

It's almost a wrap

For our life here in Alabama. We're counting days, three days exactly, before we will board the flights home to Singapore, this time for good.

And with that come the frenzied final shopping, packing, repacking, getting rid of stuffs, donating stuffs, finishing up the food stuff, sending boxes back etc etc.



With this week being the Spring break, the kids will not return to school for the final term except Adem of course.

We're finally going home

It's confirmed that we are returning soon, but until the flight arrangements are not screwed up (like some other time), we will release the date. But it should be next week.

Oh yes...more packing to do.

Let's talk about happy stuffs

I was feeling so pissed yesterday that I told myself to sleep over it and maybe I would feel better when I wake up. I woke up with a heavy heart, and still reeling from the left overs. But it's so over now, well almost.

Let's talk about happy stuffs.

My tree is in its glorious green shades this spring. No pics here but will take a walk tomorrow to capture the tree that stands in front of the house.

I cooked a full spread of Malay dishes yesterday morning (before the pissing began..hehe). We had white rice with beef rendang, sambal goreng and bergedil, plus the serunding that has been frozen in the refrigerator since last Raya (note: I think it was two months before raya but it still tastes good). I was so tired after the cooking, really. I mean the three combination above is no easy feat for a novice cook like me. But it was well worth it. And after being pissed, gorging after the rendang tastes all the better.

Today I didn't cook because there were still so much food left.

Tomorrow, I planned to make tom yum soup for hubby. And maybe grill or microwave the salmon for Afzal. Also, I was planning to make white mee hoon (mee hoon putih) and fried chicken so that hubby can bring to work since they are having sort of 'farewell' party in his unit. And since hubby and his one other Malay/ Muslim colleague will not be able to eat the food that they themselves are buying for their local colleagues, I'm making the above for them.

Now that it's Spring, the swimming pool is opened again but I've yet to bring Afzal there, and also a dip for myself ...that will be so refreshing but I will have to wait for another week for me, geddit? If you geddit, there goes the hope of a bun in the oven...maybe next month?

It's really annoying

I find it so annoying and irritating that when some people lured others to agree with them on certain things but at the end of it, they have a specific hidden agenda to attain. They are so manipulative and calculative that they gained so much by playing out the others.

I shall not say more, as honesty in the blogging world will not help anyone, and may even jeopardize everything. For now, that is what really gets to me.

For those type of people, they don't deserve my respect and certainly not my friendship either.

I was so...

...not in the mood to update my blog for the fact that Afzal was having fever on and off last week. He only went to school for two days the whole of last week and furthemore, I was doing a lot of packing. Today, we sent 4 boxes back to Singapore by UPS and of now, we are still unsure of our departure date.

Some of hubby's colleagues will be returning anytime between 18-20th April but there are four of them, us included, that may have to stay for a little longer, probably till end of April or first week or even second week of May.

The uncertainty is the part that gets to me.

I've been 'headhunted' from back home but again, there was no finalisation of the offer, and that makes me feel unable to make a decision about my future. If they need me to start in May, I have to get going in preparing for my flight home at least a week or two before the start day so that I can get over the jetlag and everything. However there is still no news, and I don't know whether I should email or call to find out the status of the offer or just let it be, after all, they were the ones who contacted me.

Legoland

It was a one and a half hour drive to Legoland which is in the outskirts of San Diego. By the time we arrived, it was already 11.00 am and datuk was hungry for a hot cuppa of coffee. Though the rides at Legoland are rather gentle and most cater to the needs of toddlers or very young children, Afzal had a blast because according to him, it was not as scary as the other theme parks. As for datuk, it was time for some snooze.


In front of a Lego house.


Building blocks.


Afzal got his first driving licence here on a volvo.


Datuk and Ayah standing in front of NY skyscrapers made of Lego.

The next day

The adventure is just beginning. What better way to start the holiday with some glam factor.

Like Datuk, Like Cucu

With cool shades and stripey green polo, datuk and cucu glam'd up for some action as we started Day 2 with a trip north to Universal Hollywood Studio.

LA Traffic

Beware of LA's traffic even on the freeways during peak hours. A 30 minute ride could potentially become 90 minutes when the road is jammed up all the way.

Universal Studios Hollywood

Greeted with a red carpet welcome, datuk and cucu is already feeling celebrity-like. Nothing can stop this glam'd duo in storming the studios.

Spiderman

The word is 'Thrilled' with a capital T. As Spiderman signed Afzal's autograph book, mom-photographer strikes a conversation with Spiderman and asked, "Are you Tobey McGuire?" to which he replied, "Tobey is an actor. I'm spiderman." Oh yeah, whatever.

The Kong

With the new release of King Kong's movie, datuk did not hesitate to be pictured with the giant ape while my son is nowhere in sight.

Shrek

An ugly happy couple obligingly signed autograph for the boy in the stripey green polo while cardboard Donkey and what's left of Lord Farquhar looked on.

It's a Small World

This is the one ride that Datuk was searching for until the end of the day, to reminisce the time he was here 18 years ago.

Rusini and her darlings

The evening ends at Rusini's posh home and dinner at a Mediterranean restaurant later. It was a chance to see her new baby Aya and also for Afzal to meet his 'old friend', Erisa whom he refers to as the little girl with the heart. The first time they met, Erisa was wearing a t-shirt that has pink hearts.

Next change.

The journey began...

As Tahir's training stint is nearing its end here in Alabama, we made a decision that we would take a flight and drive holiday to one destination within the USA before we return to Singapore for good, bearing in mind that we may not have a chance to come here again as easily in future. After some contemplation and asking around from online buddies in Rantauan, we shorlisted a few - 1) New York/ Niagara/ Toronto (Canada), 2) Seattle, Washington State and possibly to British Columbia (Canada), 3) San Francisco down to Los Angeles and further down to San Diego and finally to Tijuana (Mexico) and back up to Los Angeles again. 4) Los Angeles to Las Vegas to Grand Canyon and San Francisco.

Being the travel bug that I am, it was hard to be realistic, therefore the shortlisting looked like we want to attempt it all even with an immigration hop to either Canada or Mexico borders. Unfortunately, we did not have an unlimitless budget or even time. Unless of course I'm married to John Travolta, that will be a different story altogether.

So one night, after watching American Idol, Afzal said, "I want to go Hollywood," that's when we finally decided, Hollywood it will be then.

We chose an affordable and fastest flight we could get, and with a stopover at Memphis, Tennessee, we did not hesitate to soak in a little atmosphere of rock, soul, jazz and blues as Memphis is not only the birthtown of these music and its musicians, it was the hometown of music legend, Elvis Presley.


The aerial view as we flew from the mid-west to the western part of USA was a study in geography in itself. Eventhough we did not cross any international borders, however we entered into two time zones from Central time where we began to Mountain time and finally Pacific time. That is how huge the country is, and how bountiful it is.

The massiveness of this land of the Almighty Creator is just awe-inspiring and breathtaking. With a view of the different terrains, vegetation or the lack of it, meandering rivers and other geological architectures, it was a sight to behold. Just flying below, above and into the clouds, we were full of trepidation of the turbulence but at the same time praying and feeling the grace of Allah, what's more if we had caught a sight of the Grand Canyon.

After nearly six hours on the plane, we finally arrived to urbanisation. As the plane approaches the city of Los Angeles, the busy and industrialised map of what's below us was a sharp contrast to the earth where we had flew by. It just goes to show how much mankind has changed the face and shape of our planet Earth, and with that, we landed safely on the runway of LAX airport.

More to come.

Note: I could only upload 4 photos per blog entry, therefore this has to be in chapters, episodes, scenes etc, unless there is a way that I don't know about.

No pictures to tell the story

If I have my pictures, it will tell the story of our trip to Los Angeles but the unseen dew has not disappeared from my viewcam despite "hairdrying" it. This is so trying, and with much disappointment, I'm definitely getting a newer, better and affordable digital camera. You hear me, Sharpviewcam!!!

I have many little stories to tell but in a nutshell, we had a great trip. We arrived on 13 March an hour after my Father landed in LAX airport direct from Singapore. And off we took a shuttle bus to the car rental place and got our PT Cruiser and cruised to the lousy hotel that I had mistakably chosen, in an area that I found out later was a crime-ridden part of LA. No wonder for the many sirens we heard in the wee hours of the morning. After checking in, we headed to find a halal eatery which we had selected via Zabihah, and unfortunately the one we chose, Belacan Grill, was closed on that Monday night. So we tracked Halal Grill, but we could not find the place and all of us were famished by then. Luckily we found our third choice, Bilal Cuisine. It was so nikmat when we had the nasi beriyani, naan and all the curries. It was definitely much easier to find halal eateries compared to 18 years ago when my family first came here for a holiday. But the lessons learnt are either to call the eatery first if you have a cellphone or have a few nearby addresses just in case.

The next day, off we drove to Universal Hollywood and spent an entire day there. The evening, I brought my family to my friend Rusini's and Dayan's house in a posh part of LA. So Afzal get to meet his 'old friend' Erisa and their new bundle, Aya.

Our third day was spent at Disneyland LA because Father wanted to revisit the happiest place on earth, the footprints of which he had left 18 years ago. So we went there, and at the end of the day, he was still searching for that one ride he wanted to take "It's a small world" ride to rekindle old memories but my son only wanted the "nascar ride."

The day after, we travelled one and a half hours to the outskirt of San Diego to Legoland. Afzal had a blast there, though I felt that the rides are too gentle, in fact more suitable for toddlers. Knowing my son well, this is his standard for now. It was also Father's 61st birthday and he received an Oscar from Afzal (newly bought from Universal Hollywood, hehe) for being The Best Grandpa and Afzal's very own self-made card. After Legoland, we had dinner at Jamillah's Garden, a halal Chinese restaurant. It was our usual dinner but Father told Mak that it was a six course birthday dinner for him from us. Well, we are happy as long as you are happy, Father!

We woke up late on Friday because we already had three days of theme parks, so it was free and easy today. We had lunch at Toko Rame, an Indonesian eatery, so we got our nasi campur with bagedil, urap and other ala Melayu food stuff. We could not find the mosque that Tahir had checked from the internet, so the men missed their Friday prayers. That afternoon, we headed to Hollywood's Kodak Theatre and Walk of Fame. Rusini and her two darlings met us there and later only Rusini and me had a girl's night out in old town Pasadena, just the both of us.

Off we went to Seal Beach on Saturday, and had lunched at an online friend - Sharifah's and Leland's cosy and lovely apartment overlooking the Pacific Ocean. I also had the opportunity to meet other Rantauan members there. It was a lovely day as Afzal experienced sand sledding on the beach. We went to South Bay Galleria for some shopping after that but we did not get much stuffs.

On the Sunday that we checked out, we drove to Santa Monica Pier, and that's where we got the Bubba Gump's souvenirs and later to Downtown LA again to get more souvenirs before we were stucked in LA traffic even on a Sunday afternoon. Had our final meals at Bilal Cuisine again before our flights back to our respective homes. Of course, Father back to Singapore and us to Alabama.

So until my Sharpviewcam decides not to merajuk, I have no pictorial memories to share. Oh barnacle!

Me - A Film Writer

You Should Be a Film Writer

You don't just create compelling stories, you see them as clearly as a movie in your mind. You have a knack for details and dialogue. You can really make a character come to life. Chances are, you enjoy creating all types of stories. The joy is in the storytelling. And nothing would please you more than millions of people seeing your story on the big screen!

What Type of Writer Should You Be?

Definitely not impossible but then again, it always happens that my film never really have an ending. I cannot find a good ending to my 'stories'.

Darn my viewcam

My Sharp viewcam is not so sharp after all. It has it's weather swings. Whenever we travel to cold places, the 'dew' sets in and therefore it crashes all our hopes to capture the precious of moments. I would not be able to shoot videos, but I could still take one still at a time before pooh! it goes off again. What happens is, moi, the unofficial camera woman, because as usual, men (aka hubby) is so helpless at this gagget, therefore you would see less of me in photos (sigh), would get everyone posed quickly, switch to the still mode and snap. Sometimes I would like to get a better frame by zooming in or out, but that could hardly happen because the viewcam would die off before I could snap. So I quickly on it again and snap! Sometimes well-framed, sometimes 'asal snap aje' hoping that the picture will turn out fine. Now, I need to let it recuperate, give it warmth and some tender loving care like using a hairdryer so as to get the unseen dew disappear. It hasn't as yet.

You're going to Hollywood, Dude!

Image copyright of
www.carpenoctem.tv/ haunt/ca/img/sign.jpg

We're not on American Idol but we are going to Hollywood! Our flight is tomorrow morning with a stopover at Memphis, Tennessee and finally to Los Angeles. It will be more than six hours of flight and with the stopover, that will add up to more than 7 hours. As good as taking a flight from Singapore to Melbourne, Australia.

Afzal will be able to meet his Datuk as Datuk will fly from Singapore to meet us in LA, and off we go jalan-jalan. It's really sad that nenek does not want to come, because nenek is nannying my good friend's son but we will still have fun. Nenek, Afzal will definitely miss you lots!!!

So until next week, we're taking a break!

This is not a recipe.

And so the saying goes that the way to a man's heart is through his stomach. This saying, however, never mentioned whether it is homecooked meals or those you buy ready-made from coffee shops and hawker centres. So before we even get married, I would tell hubby that I am not a cook. It was not an issue with hubby as I've already captured his heart then with my beautiful warm smile and adventurous spirit, at least that's what he told me. Rewind about 7 years back, when my in-laws came over to ask for my hand or maybe it was just a kenal-mengenal session, when suddenly, without informing me in advance so that I was better prepared for the situation, my mom dropped a bombshell on my in-laws that literally 'make my water face drop'. She said, "Walaupun anak saya ni belajar tinggi-tinggi, tapi dia tak pandai masak." Oh my...for the love of mum and heaven under her feet, why on earth did she have to do that? In-laws need not know of your culinary inadequacies especially when my better half has approved my lack of culinary skills. I could sense the delayed reaction and uncertainty of my mother-in-law's "....ahhhh...takpelah, nanti boleh belajar". Though mom and me debated about this after that, and though there were others on her side who believed it was for my own benefit, my esteem in cooking has never been the same ever since...sigh.

When we got our first home and was ready to move in, the presents from my mother-in-law includes a whole set of periuk-belangah from xs, s, m, l and xl that you can stacked them up. She gave me her hardly-used black set of plates, bowls, and cutlery, including the Chinese style soup spoon. It was the biggest hint to me that "Ya betcha start cooking for me son". Oh well... I'm a full time working woman, where got time to cook maybe except weekends, but then again we would always be at mom's or mil's place for the weekend.

Now fast forward to today. Eversince being a stay-at-home-mom in Alabama, I have never cooked so much in my life before. But I will stress that my cooking is not in the same league as mom's or mil's, for the fact that I can never beat them at their area of specialisation. As long as my lauk is edible and that hubby and son appreciate them, it does not matter what others think anymore. It is always good to hear especially my son saying, "Sedapnya mama masak!" That really make my day and make all the penat go away.

Top pix - Beef steak with gravy, bake potato, carrots, broccoli and snap beans.
Bottom pix - Sweet and sour fish with broccoli and red capsicum my style.

To the pasar I go

When travelling and living overseas in Mat Salleh countries, the first things that I would look up for from the internet are mosques, halal butchers and eateries. Having an Asian market or an Indian Market is definitely a huge bonus. Most of these small grocers are not listed on the internet, so when we drive around, we either open our eyes big big or open our mouth and asked around - like stopping a hejab wearing lady and asked where she get her halal meat or an Asian looking person for any Asian groceries.

The above Asian market is only about 5 mins drive from our apartment, and it belongs to a family who were originally from Laos. Here you can get your much needed lemon grass for that masak lemak, ginger, garlangal (lengkuas), daun limau purut, kesum and some asian vegetables like kailan and entah apa lagi. They have all types of sauces - soya sauce, fish sauce, teriyaki, dark sauce etc. However they do not import our favourite kicap cap kipas and maggie chilli sauce so that's too bad for us. The chilli sauce are usually sweet. Sometimes, they bring in durians too. But I'm totally not a durian fan.

One thing about going pasar or marketing here, if I really want to get like one month supplies or something, it will be like going on an excursion. It's easier in Singapore or even Malaysia where you just go to the wet market and you can get meat, fish, seafood, vegetables, your rempah-ratus (spices and herbs) all at one place under one roof. For us here, we would have to go to the International Market, which is just opposite our apartment for our halal meat, then the 5 minute drive to Asian Market for the herbs that are so important especially in Malay cooking or other stuffs like mee hoon, kway teow, ikan bilis etc. Drive another 15-20 minutes to Mudbugs should we want to buy fish, prawns, crabs or crawfish. Then another 20 minutes to the Indian Store for things like curry leaves, cili kering (which by the way is not the same), and whatever mama you want, including renting a Bollywood video. Then lastly a trip to Walmart to get your other essentials like eggs, cooking oil, 'western' vegetables, snacks etc.

So the whole morning is spent on 5 different locations just for marketing. I'm not complaining, in fact, it's an adventure in itself going pasar which I only did once in a blue moon back in Singapore.

So why cannot sleep?

Afzal went to sleep about eight plus after American Idol, and after I had tucked him in bed and read to him The Fly Went Past by Mike McClintock. I went to bed at eleven nish last night after hubby was already very much in slumberland also.

At 1.40 am, I awoke, only to hear distant noises, noises that emanated from the living room. Hubby was still sound asleep in bed, and as I walked out of my bedroom, the living room's light was on.

I walked to the living room and saw my little son sitting down on his blue chair watching tv...at 1.40 in the morning. I was like, "what time did you wake up?" I asked Afzal, "I don't know. But I watched three (cartoons) already." This was not the first time that Afzal had woken up and instead of going to our room to ngendeng on our bed, he goes to the living room to watch tv. But usually this happens at about 5 or 6 am instead. So I was appalled. And though he was watching 'cartoons', it was actually adult swim - cartoon that's intended for mature audiences. Once, I watched an episode where the female character was singing a cabaret about Muslim women, oppression, hejab and Arab men. It was supposedly to be humorous but it strikes a bad aftertaste for me.

I told Afzal that the cartoon is not meant for young children. He asked 'why?' but I couldn't remember what I told him but coerced him to go to sleep instead, and of course, I slept together with him in his bed. He was restless in bed until he finally fall asleep.

I wanted to pull out the switch before I go to bed but I was afraid that if Afzal wakes up in the wee hours and I did not hear him, he would try to figure out the cables and that would be more dangerous. Sometimes eventhough he sleeps later, he would still wake up early. And when the alarm clock rings at 6 am, and me just stirred from bed, Afzal would come walking from the living room after watching tv from God-knows-what-time instead of his bedroom ready to take his shower for school. Aiyoh, this is so mind boggling and to think that he is just a little after 5 years old.

Not much news

The daily dose of local news on Fox10 especially on Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday nights for the last few weeks have all been about American Idol Taylor Hicks and his grandmother, Joni.

Macam takde cerita lain pulak. Looks like the reporter, Adam Ghassemi, had to camp out near the nenek's house now that Taylor is in the top 12.

Tornado Watch

It's been gusty winds for the last two days, and I could hear the howling of the winds despite being indoors. Nothing major I thought, just gusty winds.

Then on American Idol tonight, there was a tornado watch warning at the left bottom screen with a map of the supposed area - in Washington County, Alabama.

So hopefully it stays there.

Me the Virginal Blogger

Nak kata virginal, dah mak budak pun, tapi itulah, when it comes to the rule of thumb in the blogging world, me so virginallah.

I was tagged by another blogger, Apples, but the clueles me merely thank her and thought that was that but it was only much much later that I realised after reading some other people's blogs that tagging has another meaning. So being the late bloomer that I am, here's my contribution to being tagged.

Disclaimer: Below is just a gist of my life, which others may find boring, so just be warned before you read ahead. You may skipped all of it.

4 Jobs
In non-chronological order

1)SAHM: This is my current much enviable profession by some other career women, but then again, not every one can and will be SAHM which by the way stands for Stay-At-Home-Mom which sounded more sophisticated than housewife. I would also rather be known as a homemaker. But seriously, me and household chores just do not agree with each other because being SAHM does not equal domestication.

2) Research Associate: For a short span of four months, I was in academia before I dutifully followed my hubby to the states to be in profession no 1.

3) Master’s Student: I was juggling too many things at one go – full-time/overtime/underpaid career woman, wifehood, motherhood and decided that this is the only one that I will pursue for now back in June 2004.

4) Television Producer and Director: This has been almost my entire whole life career, almost a ten year lifespan until I finally gave way to being a student mom.

4 Movies
After being married-with-a-kid, my movie scene looks like these…
1) Chicken Little
2) Yours, Mine and Ours
3) Madagascar
4) The Invincibles

4 Places I’ve Lived
1) Alabama, USA – nearing one year
2) Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia – 5 months
3) Singapore – seems like forever
4) In my mom’s womb – 9 months

4 TV Shows I liked but may not watch them all the time
1) American Idol, CSI, The Apprentice
2) And for some no brainer show – The Next American Top Model reruns but for some grey matter stuff – CNN, Fox News
3) House Hunters, Designers' Challenge, Designed to Sell on HGTV
4) Clean House on Style Network …very therapeutic
Can I add the shows that I HAD to watch – everything on Cartoon Network and Nickelodeon (no prizes for guessing why).

4 places I've been on vacation
1) USA: Los Angeles (1987 and soon once again), New York (1997), Orlando, Florida (2005), Atlanta, Georgia and some other southern states in the US.

2) Europe: In 1994, I went for a one month Europe tour after my graduation and that covered cities and countries like Berlin, Hannover, Hamburg (Germany), Salzburg, Vienna (Austria), San Marino, Rome, Pisa, Venice (Italy), Vatican City; Lourdes, Bordeaux, Paris (France), Amsterdam (Holland), Brussels (Belgium), Luxembourg, London, Prague (Czech Republic), Liechtenstein, Zurich, Bern (Switzerland)… that’s about it I think. It was a super jam packed and tiring holiday, made memorable by the fact that I got chicken pox in Germany and infected some of the people in the tour. Oops! But it was an absolutely fantabulous holiday! Also, I went to London in 1988 because my cousin was studying there at that time. Went to Paris in 1997 for work – to do a story on Yves Saint Laurent and a bit of the French Fashion Week.

3) Australia & New Zealand : Perth, Melbourne(three times), Brisbane, Gold Coast and Christchurch (twice).

4) Asia: Many parts of Malaysia, Phuket (Thailand), Bali, Batam and Bintan islands (Indonesia), Seoul (South Korea) and Tokyo (Japan). Manila (Phillipines) as a little girl which I can hardly remember much now.

Oh can I add…Mauritius for my honeymoon.

4 Blogs I visited
1) My blog! Who else would read my blog if not me, right? *Wink*
2) Some blogs from Sentraal Station so that will add up to more than 4
3) My Multiply blog
4) My Multiply friends

4 of your Favourite Food
1) Anything Thai
2) Anything Chinese
3) Anything Roast
4) Anything Pedas- Melayu style

4 Places I’d rather be
1) In Heaven
2) In the country of my dreams
3) In my hubby’s arms (ehem)
4) In my son’s company (so difficult these days to really get him to hug or kiss you unless bribed)

4 Albums I can’t live without
I haven’t had any albums that I buy much. Really. Either I used to get it free or I just listen to the radio. Now, it’s everything related to Afzal
1) Children’s Nasheed Collection in English and Malay
2) The Best of Blue which incidentally belongs to Afzal
3) Some Malay songs that hubby downloaded (because it’s been a while since we hear Malay songs)
4) For English songs...Radiolah

4 Vehicles I’ve owned with hubby except the last one
1) Black Hyundai Matrix
2) Blue Hyundai Accent
3) Silver second hand Rover
4) My pair of legs, roller blades and roller skates

If you managed to read this line, you actually read all of what I have to write or you skipped to this part. Until then...Afzalmom signing off for now.

The circus came to town

Afzal received a coupon from school for a Mobile Circus at the Greater Mobile Fairground, so we decided to head down to the fairground to spend a day there. The price was USD 20 for adult and USD 7 for child but with the coupon, we only need to pay USD 5 each and entrance for Afzal was free.

As we drove into the fairground, the parking was USD5 and as our door opened, our noses were greeted with the animal's stench. There were ponies, elephants and camels beside the circus tentage and I actually saw a male elephant peed! Yes, that was like huge gallons of pee that could potentially create a mini pee pool.

Afzal was not impressed by the animals, or maybe he was just not interested or afraid when we persuaded him to take an animal ride. But our impression of the circus fall short of what we thought a circus would be but then again, we were thinking this is Mobile, Alabama, not some modern cosmopolitan.

It was not a huge crowd that gathered but enough to fill up the tent. There were of course many little children brought in by parents and grandparents. It was a family event. As everyone moved in to find a spot, the seats were some hard wooden planks. The equipments inside looked dated and wasn't something to rave about. The show started with two female and one male jugglers from Colombia. In fact, these performers were family members. There were also other low key performances with fires and other gadgetries.

I am not a big fan of circus but I have also never been to one, but this one is definitely a neighbourhood circus, nothing of the international standard that you would see in Moscow or Beijing circuses. Even the clown was unfunny, and there were only elephants, dogs and monkey acts. If only these animals could speak, I wonder whether they would tell their owner that they would like to throw the towel in.

Afzal asked for nachos with cheese, snow cones, balloons and a toy that they sell near the entrance, but we only succumb to the nachos and snow cones. I think they made more sales with all these extras. After a while, Afzal got really restless with the not-so-adrenaline-pumping show. Also, it's quite funny when the snow cone man is also the one who assist the juggler with her gadgets, and he is also the motor rider in the motorbike globe act. Multi-tasking for sure, so you would have a sense of the category that this circus would fall into. A circus for the Mobile family from a family of circus performers.

That motorbike act was the only one that Afzal like. As for me, I had backache sitting on the hard wooden plank. But for USD 5, that's as good as it gets.

Orange Beach, Gulf Shores

So here we are at Orange Beach, on a winter-day-that-felt-like-summer, as Afzal roamed around on the sandy white beaches, teasing the waves as it lapped onto the shores.



As he combed the beach, he started to pick up little shells that littered the sandy white beach. Without asking, he showed me his handful of unbroken shells.



Soon, he had his shoes wet, and the millions grains of sand had stuck to his shoes and socks.



After he had his fun, and his shoes soaking wet from the wash, we went to a surf shop and bought this orange beach shoes. It was not so much that we wanted it to be orange just because we were on Orange Beach but the blue ones did not have his size and another set were pink and purple.

After wearing this orange beach shoes, Afzal exclaimed, “I felt like a clown” and off he clowned around the streets of Orange Beach. After much clowning and monkeying around, it was time to head back to Mobile, which was an hour and a half drive away, and it would be dark by the time we reached home.

The weekend drive part 2

We made a stop at one of Foley's Giant Flea Market, but as we did not really find much bric-a-brac as compared to the flea market in Schillinger, we decided to drive further and somehow, made a turn towards Orange Beach and Gulf Shores.


Orange beach, the hometown of silver haired American Idol Contestant Taylor Hick's grandmother.
Taylor is from Birmingham but dear granny stays in Orange Beach, and she is a big supporter and fan of her grandchild as she invited 150 guests to a dine-by-the-pool-beach house to watch and vote for Taylor's maiden performance on Idol.

To be continued.

Our weekend drive

It was the weekend and we decided to take a drive towards Foley, the place where we usually go for our shopping spree at Tanger Outlet. But unlike the usual stop at Tanger, we want to see something new and different.


Once we hit Interstate Highway 10, we will be driving towards Downtown Mobile under the tunnel and onto a long bridge that connects Downtown Mobile to the Eastern Shore part of Alabama. This long bridge opens up to the Gulf of Mexico. And as we travelled along this bridge on a sunny day, it was pure vast expanse of the gulf.





The America as we know it from cities like New York, Los Angeles and Las Vegas are huge departues from the southern states, well, not in this part of Alabama that I know of. This is rural America, and as we drove past vast grassland, we would also come across farm markets, antique shops and old gas stations. The Burris Farm Markets and the likes are considered not very rural, there are others that are more "kampung" than these.

To be continued.

My Tree Part 2

This picture was taken during the fall season when winter was about to creep in. From where I was standing, I could see that half of the tree had auburny red leaves while the other half, the branches were bare because the leaves had fallen.





This is my tree on one fall day before the mild Mobile winter had shaken all its leaves away. Below is the tree in winter and it's a sign that spring is almost here.

My Tree

My tree which stands tall across the street from my corridor.

On close-up, you can see white flowers budding from it. I've always thought that leaves would sprout first.

Spring is coming

White flowers has 'bud' from my tree. Yes, my big tree that is just across on the other side of our apartment. The tree that I have seen the seasonal changes taking root. When I have the time again, I'll upload pictures of my tree. Coming soon.

Fat Tuesday

It's the last day of mardi gras, and why is it called Fat Tuesday, beats me. I haven't got the time to find out much about this event, but it seems that mardi gras started in Mobile, Alabama at least that's what I heard.



Here's the loot from our catch at the parade from stuff toys to beads, doubloons, moonpies, sweets, candy floss, compass, whistle, a football and even a pack of peanuts.

Croc-choc or Choc-croc

At Silver Sands Factory Outlet, Destin, we stopped for a little snack of a white croc-choc chosen by the little one.


The milk choc-croc's head is bitten off by a grinning bigger alligator...

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Mardi Gras-Haha Parade

It was a Sunday afternoon, and the children's mardi gras parade was about to take place at Cottage Hill and Sage Avenue. The little fella was unhappy and grouchy. I hate parades, I want to stay home blah blah blah so he stood in a corner away from the madding crowd just to prove his point that the parade was not his idea of fun.



But soon he realised that this parade was not scary or threatening as his brain cells had told him earlier. So my little fella decided that he can join in the merry-o-making with all the other children. He now moved with the crowd catching the goodies that were thrown out to the little people on the streets by the kids paraders on the floats.

It was no wonder many children came with little plastic bags, so that they can grab whatever they can and put their stuffs in the plastic bags. After some catching, here are some stuffs that my little fella managed to get and he was beaming happy ha ha ha with candies, cups, whistles, coin, chains.

So the day ends with my little fella looking much happier than when he first started out. He realised that this kids' mardi gras parade was actually fun and told us that he wanted to go for another. That's my little fella, he panicked first not knowing what it was but now he knows.