This is not a recipe.

And so the saying goes that the way to a man's heart is through his stomach. This saying, however, never mentioned whether it is homecooked meals or those you buy ready-made from coffee shops and hawker centres. So before we even get married, I would tell hubby that I am not a cook. It was not an issue with hubby as I've already captured his heart then with my beautiful warm smile and adventurous spirit, at least that's what he told me. Rewind about 7 years back, when my in-laws came over to ask for my hand or maybe it was just a kenal-mengenal session, when suddenly, without informing me in advance so that I was better prepared for the situation, my mom dropped a bombshell on my in-laws that literally 'make my water face drop'. She said, "Walaupun anak saya ni belajar tinggi-tinggi, tapi dia tak pandai masak." Oh my...for the love of mum and heaven under her feet, why on earth did she have to do that? In-laws need not know of your culinary inadequacies especially when my better half has approved my lack of culinary skills. I could sense the delayed reaction and uncertainty of my mother-in-law's "....ahhhh...takpelah, nanti boleh belajar". Though mom and me debated about this after that, and though there were others on her side who believed it was for my own benefit, my esteem in cooking has never been the same ever since...sigh.

When we got our first home and was ready to move in, the presents from my mother-in-law includes a whole set of periuk-belangah from xs, s, m, l and xl that you can stacked them up. She gave me her hardly-used black set of plates, bowls, and cutlery, including the Chinese style soup spoon. It was the biggest hint to me that "Ya betcha start cooking for me son". Oh well... I'm a full time working woman, where got time to cook maybe except weekends, but then again we would always be at mom's or mil's place for the weekend.

Now fast forward to today. Eversince being a stay-at-home-mom in Alabama, I have never cooked so much in my life before. But I will stress that my cooking is not in the same league as mom's or mil's, for the fact that I can never beat them at their area of specialisation. As long as my lauk is edible and that hubby and son appreciate them, it does not matter what others think anymore. It is always good to hear especially my son saying, "Sedapnya mama masak!" That really make my day and make all the penat go away.

Top pix - Beef steak with gravy, bake potato, carrots, broccoli and snap beans.
Bottom pix - Sweet and sour fish with broccoli and red capsicum my style.

To the pasar I go

When travelling and living overseas in Mat Salleh countries, the first things that I would look up for from the internet are mosques, halal butchers and eateries. Having an Asian market or an Indian Market is definitely a huge bonus. Most of these small grocers are not listed on the internet, so when we drive around, we either open our eyes big big or open our mouth and asked around - like stopping a hejab wearing lady and asked where she get her halal meat or an Asian looking person for any Asian groceries.

The above Asian market is only about 5 mins drive from our apartment, and it belongs to a family who were originally from Laos. Here you can get your much needed lemon grass for that masak lemak, ginger, garlangal (lengkuas), daun limau purut, kesum and some asian vegetables like kailan and entah apa lagi. They have all types of sauces - soya sauce, fish sauce, teriyaki, dark sauce etc. However they do not import our favourite kicap cap kipas and maggie chilli sauce so that's too bad for us. The chilli sauce are usually sweet. Sometimes, they bring in durians too. But I'm totally not a durian fan.

One thing about going pasar or marketing here, if I really want to get like one month supplies or something, it will be like going on an excursion. It's easier in Singapore or even Malaysia where you just go to the wet market and you can get meat, fish, seafood, vegetables, your rempah-ratus (spices and herbs) all at one place under one roof. For us here, we would have to go to the International Market, which is just opposite our apartment for our halal meat, then the 5 minute drive to Asian Market for the herbs that are so important especially in Malay cooking or other stuffs like mee hoon, kway teow, ikan bilis etc. Drive another 15-20 minutes to Mudbugs should we want to buy fish, prawns, crabs or crawfish. Then another 20 minutes to the Indian Store for things like curry leaves, cili kering (which by the way is not the same), and whatever mama you want, including renting a Bollywood video. Then lastly a trip to Walmart to get your other essentials like eggs, cooking oil, 'western' vegetables, snacks etc.

So the whole morning is spent on 5 different locations just for marketing. I'm not complaining, in fact, it's an adventure in itself going pasar which I only did once in a blue moon back in Singapore.

So why cannot sleep?

Afzal went to sleep about eight plus after American Idol, and after I had tucked him in bed and read to him The Fly Went Past by Mike McClintock. I went to bed at eleven nish last night after hubby was already very much in slumberland also.

At 1.40 am, I awoke, only to hear distant noises, noises that emanated from the living room. Hubby was still sound asleep in bed, and as I walked out of my bedroom, the living room's light was on.

I walked to the living room and saw my little son sitting down on his blue chair watching tv...at 1.40 in the morning. I was like, "what time did you wake up?" I asked Afzal, "I don't know. But I watched three (cartoons) already." This was not the first time that Afzal had woken up and instead of going to our room to ngendeng on our bed, he goes to the living room to watch tv. But usually this happens at about 5 or 6 am instead. So I was appalled. And though he was watching 'cartoons', it was actually adult swim - cartoon that's intended for mature audiences. Once, I watched an episode where the female character was singing a cabaret about Muslim women, oppression, hejab and Arab men. It was supposedly to be humorous but it strikes a bad aftertaste for me.

I told Afzal that the cartoon is not meant for young children. He asked 'why?' but I couldn't remember what I told him but coerced him to go to sleep instead, and of course, I slept together with him in his bed. He was restless in bed until he finally fall asleep.

I wanted to pull out the switch before I go to bed but I was afraid that if Afzal wakes up in the wee hours and I did not hear him, he would try to figure out the cables and that would be more dangerous. Sometimes eventhough he sleeps later, he would still wake up early. And when the alarm clock rings at 6 am, and me just stirred from bed, Afzal would come walking from the living room after watching tv from God-knows-what-time instead of his bedroom ready to take his shower for school. Aiyoh, this is so mind boggling and to think that he is just a little after 5 years old.

Not much news

The daily dose of local news on Fox10 especially on Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday nights for the last few weeks have all been about American Idol Taylor Hicks and his grandmother, Joni.

Macam takde cerita lain pulak. Looks like the reporter, Adam Ghassemi, had to camp out near the nenek's house now that Taylor is in the top 12.

Tornado Watch

It's been gusty winds for the last two days, and I could hear the howling of the winds despite being indoors. Nothing major I thought, just gusty winds.

Then on American Idol tonight, there was a tornado watch warning at the left bottom screen with a map of the supposed area - in Washington County, Alabama.

So hopefully it stays there.

Me the Virginal Blogger

Nak kata virginal, dah mak budak pun, tapi itulah, when it comes to the rule of thumb in the blogging world, me so virginallah.

I was tagged by another blogger, Apples, but the clueles me merely thank her and thought that was that but it was only much much later that I realised after reading some other people's blogs that tagging has another meaning. So being the late bloomer that I am, here's my contribution to being tagged.

Disclaimer: Below is just a gist of my life, which others may find boring, so just be warned before you read ahead. You may skipped all of it.

4 Jobs
In non-chronological order

1)SAHM: This is my current much enviable profession by some other career women, but then again, not every one can and will be SAHM which by the way stands for Stay-At-Home-Mom which sounded more sophisticated than housewife. I would also rather be known as a homemaker. But seriously, me and household chores just do not agree with each other because being SAHM does not equal domestication.

2) Research Associate: For a short span of four months, I was in academia before I dutifully followed my hubby to the states to be in profession no 1.

3) Master’s Student: I was juggling too many things at one go – full-time/overtime/underpaid career woman, wifehood, motherhood and decided that this is the only one that I will pursue for now back in June 2004.

4) Television Producer and Director: This has been almost my entire whole life career, almost a ten year lifespan until I finally gave way to being a student mom.

4 Movies
After being married-with-a-kid, my movie scene looks like these…
1) Chicken Little
2) Yours, Mine and Ours
3) Madagascar
4) The Invincibles

4 Places I’ve Lived
1) Alabama, USA – nearing one year
2) Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia – 5 months
3) Singapore – seems like forever
4) In my mom’s womb – 9 months

4 TV Shows I liked but may not watch them all the time
1) American Idol, CSI, The Apprentice
2) And for some no brainer show – The Next American Top Model reruns but for some grey matter stuff – CNN, Fox News
3) House Hunters, Designers' Challenge, Designed to Sell on HGTV
4) Clean House on Style Network …very therapeutic
Can I add the shows that I HAD to watch – everything on Cartoon Network and Nickelodeon (no prizes for guessing why).

4 places I've been on vacation
1) USA: Los Angeles (1987 and soon once again), New York (1997), Orlando, Florida (2005), Atlanta, Georgia and some other southern states in the US.

2) Europe: In 1994, I went for a one month Europe tour after my graduation and that covered cities and countries like Berlin, Hannover, Hamburg (Germany), Salzburg, Vienna (Austria), San Marino, Rome, Pisa, Venice (Italy), Vatican City; Lourdes, Bordeaux, Paris (France), Amsterdam (Holland), Brussels (Belgium), Luxembourg, London, Prague (Czech Republic), Liechtenstein, Zurich, Bern (Switzerland)… that’s about it I think. It was a super jam packed and tiring holiday, made memorable by the fact that I got chicken pox in Germany and infected some of the people in the tour. Oops! But it was an absolutely fantabulous holiday! Also, I went to London in 1988 because my cousin was studying there at that time. Went to Paris in 1997 for work – to do a story on Yves Saint Laurent and a bit of the French Fashion Week.

3) Australia & New Zealand : Perth, Melbourne(three times), Brisbane, Gold Coast and Christchurch (twice).

4) Asia: Many parts of Malaysia, Phuket (Thailand), Bali, Batam and Bintan islands (Indonesia), Seoul (South Korea) and Tokyo (Japan). Manila (Phillipines) as a little girl which I can hardly remember much now.

Oh can I add…Mauritius for my honeymoon.

4 Blogs I visited
1) My blog! Who else would read my blog if not me, right? *Wink*
2) Some blogs from Sentraal Station so that will add up to more than 4
3) My Multiply blog
4) My Multiply friends

4 of your Favourite Food
1) Anything Thai
2) Anything Chinese
3) Anything Roast
4) Anything Pedas- Melayu style

4 Places I’d rather be
1) In Heaven
2) In the country of my dreams
3) In my hubby’s arms (ehem)
4) In my son’s company (so difficult these days to really get him to hug or kiss you unless bribed)

4 Albums I can’t live without
I haven’t had any albums that I buy much. Really. Either I used to get it free or I just listen to the radio. Now, it’s everything related to Afzal
1) Children’s Nasheed Collection in English and Malay
2) The Best of Blue which incidentally belongs to Afzal
3) Some Malay songs that hubby downloaded (because it’s been a while since we hear Malay songs)
4) For English songs...Radiolah

4 Vehicles I’ve owned with hubby except the last one
1) Black Hyundai Matrix
2) Blue Hyundai Accent
3) Silver second hand Rover
4) My pair of legs, roller blades and roller skates

If you managed to read this line, you actually read all of what I have to write or you skipped to this part. Until then...Afzalmom signing off for now.

The circus came to town

Afzal received a coupon from school for a Mobile Circus at the Greater Mobile Fairground, so we decided to head down to the fairground to spend a day there. The price was USD 20 for adult and USD 7 for child but with the coupon, we only need to pay USD 5 each and entrance for Afzal was free.

As we drove into the fairground, the parking was USD5 and as our door opened, our noses were greeted with the animal's stench. There were ponies, elephants and camels beside the circus tentage and I actually saw a male elephant peed! Yes, that was like huge gallons of pee that could potentially create a mini pee pool.

Afzal was not impressed by the animals, or maybe he was just not interested or afraid when we persuaded him to take an animal ride. But our impression of the circus fall short of what we thought a circus would be but then again, we were thinking this is Mobile, Alabama, not some modern cosmopolitan.

It was not a huge crowd that gathered but enough to fill up the tent. There were of course many little children brought in by parents and grandparents. It was a family event. As everyone moved in to find a spot, the seats were some hard wooden planks. The equipments inside looked dated and wasn't something to rave about. The show started with two female and one male jugglers from Colombia. In fact, these performers were family members. There were also other low key performances with fires and other gadgetries.

I am not a big fan of circus but I have also never been to one, but this one is definitely a neighbourhood circus, nothing of the international standard that you would see in Moscow or Beijing circuses. Even the clown was unfunny, and there were only elephants, dogs and monkey acts. If only these animals could speak, I wonder whether they would tell their owner that they would like to throw the towel in.

Afzal asked for nachos with cheese, snow cones, balloons and a toy that they sell near the entrance, but we only succumb to the nachos and snow cones. I think they made more sales with all these extras. After a while, Afzal got really restless with the not-so-adrenaline-pumping show. Also, it's quite funny when the snow cone man is also the one who assist the juggler with her gadgets, and he is also the motor rider in the motorbike globe act. Multi-tasking for sure, so you would have a sense of the category that this circus would fall into. A circus for the Mobile family from a family of circus performers.

That motorbike act was the only one that Afzal like. As for me, I had backache sitting on the hard wooden plank. But for USD 5, that's as good as it gets.

Orange Beach, Gulf Shores

So here we are at Orange Beach, on a winter-day-that-felt-like-summer, as Afzal roamed around on the sandy white beaches, teasing the waves as it lapped onto the shores.



As he combed the beach, he started to pick up little shells that littered the sandy white beach. Without asking, he showed me his handful of unbroken shells.



Soon, he had his shoes wet, and the millions grains of sand had stuck to his shoes and socks.



After he had his fun, and his shoes soaking wet from the wash, we went to a surf shop and bought this orange beach shoes. It was not so much that we wanted it to be orange just because we were on Orange Beach but the blue ones did not have his size and another set were pink and purple.

After wearing this orange beach shoes, Afzal exclaimed, “I felt like a clown” and off he clowned around the streets of Orange Beach. After much clowning and monkeying around, it was time to head back to Mobile, which was an hour and a half drive away, and it would be dark by the time we reached home.

The weekend drive part 2

We made a stop at one of Foley's Giant Flea Market, but as we did not really find much bric-a-brac as compared to the flea market in Schillinger, we decided to drive further and somehow, made a turn towards Orange Beach and Gulf Shores.


Orange beach, the hometown of silver haired American Idol Contestant Taylor Hick's grandmother.
Taylor is from Birmingham but dear granny stays in Orange Beach, and she is a big supporter and fan of her grandchild as she invited 150 guests to a dine-by-the-pool-beach house to watch and vote for Taylor's maiden performance on Idol.

To be continued.

Our weekend drive

It was the weekend and we decided to take a drive towards Foley, the place where we usually go for our shopping spree at Tanger Outlet. But unlike the usual stop at Tanger, we want to see something new and different.


Once we hit Interstate Highway 10, we will be driving towards Downtown Mobile under the tunnel and onto a long bridge that connects Downtown Mobile to the Eastern Shore part of Alabama. This long bridge opens up to the Gulf of Mexico. And as we travelled along this bridge on a sunny day, it was pure vast expanse of the gulf.





The America as we know it from cities like New York, Los Angeles and Las Vegas are huge departues from the southern states, well, not in this part of Alabama that I know of. This is rural America, and as we drove past vast grassland, we would also come across farm markets, antique shops and old gas stations. The Burris Farm Markets and the likes are considered not very rural, there are others that are more "kampung" than these.

To be continued.

My Tree Part 2

This picture was taken during the fall season when winter was about to creep in. From where I was standing, I could see that half of the tree had auburny red leaves while the other half, the branches were bare because the leaves had fallen.





This is my tree on one fall day before the mild Mobile winter had shaken all its leaves away. Below is the tree in winter and it's a sign that spring is almost here.

My Tree

My tree which stands tall across the street from my corridor.

On close-up, you can see white flowers budding from it. I've always thought that leaves would sprout first.

Spring is coming

White flowers has 'bud' from my tree. Yes, my big tree that is just across on the other side of our apartment. The tree that I have seen the seasonal changes taking root. When I have the time again, I'll upload pictures of my tree. Coming soon.

Fat Tuesday

It's the last day of mardi gras, and why is it called Fat Tuesday, beats me. I haven't got the time to find out much about this event, but it seems that mardi gras started in Mobile, Alabama at least that's what I heard.



Here's the loot from our catch at the parade from stuff toys to beads, doubloons, moonpies, sweets, candy floss, compass, whistle, a football and even a pack of peanuts.

Croc-choc or Choc-croc

At Silver Sands Factory Outlet, Destin, we stopped for a little snack of a white croc-choc chosen by the little one.


The milk choc-croc's head is bitten off by a grinning bigger alligator...

Are you a Slacker Mom?

Your quiz results make you a Smarty Pants Mom

Smart parents like you have smart kids. They need plenty of intellectual stimulation and you provide them with all they need, plus lots of love. You know how to help them with algebra homework, and you are superior at kissing boo-boos.

Take this free personality test by clicking here

Chatterbean quizzes are non-scientific, non-fat and pretty much just non-sense. They are meant solely for entertainment purposes and are not intended to provide an accurate evaluation of anything.

Mardi Gras-Haha Parade

It was a Sunday afternoon, and the children's mardi gras parade was about to take place at Cottage Hill and Sage Avenue. The little fella was unhappy and grouchy. I hate parades, I want to stay home blah blah blah so he stood in a corner away from the madding crowd just to prove his point that the parade was not his idea of fun.



But soon he realised that this parade was not scary or threatening as his brain cells had told him earlier. So my little fella decided that he can join in the merry-o-making with all the other children. He now moved with the crowd catching the goodies that were thrown out to the little people on the streets by the kids paraders on the floats.

It was no wonder many children came with little plastic bags, so that they can grab whatever they can and put their stuffs in the plastic bags. After some catching, here are some stuffs that my little fella managed to get and he was beaming happy ha ha ha with candies, cups, whistles, coin, chains.

So the day ends with my little fella looking much happier than when he first started out. He realised that this kids' mardi gras parade was actually fun and told us that he wanted to go for another. That's my little fella, he panicked first not knowing what it was but now he knows.

It's a day of lurrving.

With all the cliches and commercialism that's associated with February 14, you did nothing to think or talk about it until you step into Walmart, and everything pinks, reds, hearts, flowers, chocolates and balloons greeted you like a big dollop on your face. I almost shudder with the over-decorated Walmart. No, I'm not taken in with this blatant advertisement, but maybe that chocolate looks amazingly delectable. Oh and how beautiful the roses are but more than double overpriced! I'm not taken in, anyway.

But Afzal has been talking about Valentine. It was because there were some school activities associated with this V-day. So I asked,
"I don't know what's valentine. What's valentine Afzal?"
"It's a day of loving."
"Loving? Loving who?"
"Anybody."
"Anybody? Like who?"
"You can love nenek. You can love anybody."
"Oh ok. So can I love you?"
"Yes, you can. You can love ayah also."
"Do you love me Afzal?"
"Lovelah."

And then he decided enough of this love-talk.

"Mummy, later I want to make you a card. You close your eyes ok."
"Ok."

So here's Afzal's lurrve card to me.



The front cover with an orange flower. And the word 'mama' on the priceless flower.


The insides of his card. A heart and a house with a chimney. "It's mama's house and it's in Atlanta." So said Afzal.


The back cover. Two hearts. One ayah and one mama. How sweet.



Another heart with a teddy that comes with a sash "My Valentine" and a card. I guess dear hubby got the hint when I browsed the delectable chocolates so I got this from him. Not that I want to and we don't celebrate V-day anyway, but a box of chocolates does not hurt, right? Melt...


And what did I do in return? Cook for lurrve... Nothing fancy. Just my very own baked lasagne and oven-fry chicken for dinner.

Style and writing

"Style is not how you write.
It is how you do not write like anyone else."

* * *

"When you write for children,
don't write for children.
Write from the child in you."

Charles Ghigna

Skateboarding terms

Afzal's uncle and aunty in Singapore want to show him some skateboarding tricks and here's a glossary of skateboarding lingo.

Skateboarding
These are the different parts of a skateboard: trucks, deck, wheels,griptape, hardware, bearings,risers(optional).

How to do a :

Kickflip. Put one foot on the tail and the other foot on the bolts. Kick down on the tail while sliding your other foot up diagonally. If you did it right the board should flip once and then land.

Olie: Put one foot on the tail and the other foot on the bolts. Stomp on the tail and slide your other foot straight up. If you did it right it will rise of the ground.

Shoveit: Olie but instead of keeping your feet straight you move your left foot back and your right foot forward. The board should spin counter clockwise.

Heelflip: To do a heelflip you just flip the board the the opposite direction as the kick flip.

Backside boardslide: Olie, do a 180 onto a rail or curb and slide down. When you reach the end of the rail jump of and do a 180 back into your riding stance

Source: skateboard

Afzal's crafts

Afzal had the white paper where you cut and fold to make into a paper bag, so we transformed it into a 3D paper bag. He was so intrigued that he asked to make another one, so I draw a similar one on the orange paper. And he want a picture taken with it.


The 2D nets were transformed into 3D paperbags. So here, he proudly snapped a photo of his self-made crafts.

As part of my early childhood math assignment, I created a curriculum using 3D boxes and opening these boxes up to see flattened cardboards (ie. 2D nets).

Here's a snippet of what my professor, Dr Patricia Willott of Early Childhood Math, Wheelock College had to say:-

"The extension of using 3-D boxes and making the connection to 2-D nets incorporates powerful mathematics in an area that is often neglected; we sometimes forget the 3-D aspect, and looking at the nets is a good concrete and relevant introduction to the concepts of perimeter and area. Your activities show that you are committed to making maths relevant for children, and that you are conscious of the important role of the teacher in maintaining high standards for learning."

Afzal and his skateboard

It was the coolest gift from a grandmother. Yes, it was nenek who gave Afzal a skateboard for his 5th birthday because he asked for it.


It was not nenek who chose the design, nevertheless, it was a cool gadget for a 5 year old to have... for now.

For more of his moves, click here

The view

This is the view of our apartment from our balcony on a clear day.



This is the same view from our apartment on a foggy morning.



This is the view from our front doorway in that foggy morning. See our red Malibu parked right in front.





Really foggy and cold morning.

The Snow Experience in Narita

We were unprepared to be stranded in Narita, but we did not want to miss the opportunity of experiencing some real ice and snow there. Snow blanketed the garden just outside Narita Excel Hotel.


Ayah and Afzal, in newly bought jackets, posing in the snow-laden garden. Though our jackets have an inner fleece lining, it was not enough to really keep us warm and withstand the icy cold. We did not want to buy more gloves and hats as we already have these which of course, we did not have them with us at that point.


Afzal tried his hands at making snow balls.


Beautiful shot of Ayah and Afzal on a little bridge.


There was a sudden gust of wind and the ice hit our faces. Afzal freaked out and ran haphazardly. Here, Mama is trying to hold him and asked him to cover his face on Mama's coat. Look at the car's roofs all covered with ice.

For more pictures, click here

Overnight at Narita

My dear Afzal sleeping on the cold seats of Narita Airport with a Cathay Pacific blanket courtesy of a kind passenger. Even hubby Tahir has put up and crossed his legs on the seat. See his shoes facing his left.

I wish I could snap pictures of people sleeping in the sleeping bags but it will be infringing into their privacy, so I did not do it. However I saw a caucasian man who did that, and his camera is a professional one where you can take pictures in the dark without flash. The next day a picture came out in Japan Times on the front page.

The dirt on the airlines

Having had the experience of flying on American Airline, Delta, Northwest, Continental and United, it is no wonder that the US Airline Industry is in a tailspin.

From the time I was born till the age of 24, I had the luxury of travelling only on Singapore Airlines. Not that I was of some Royalty lineage, I would then have my own private jet. And it's not that my family owns the airline, but I was lucky that my father was a pioneer at Singapore Airport Terminal Services and he and his family (that's us) are able to receive complimentary flight tickets annually to anywhere in the world on SIA and we would use the tickets if we have the money to travel or else it will just be to KL.

So I have no basis for comparison. And anyway, at most times, I have nothing to complain about SIA.

Until I couldn't receive anymore complimentary tickets, so I have to save and scrimp to travel and I have since travelled on Thai Airways, Mauritius Air, EVA, ANA, Korean Air, Japan Airlines, Emirates, Virgin, Qantas, British Airways and all of the above US carriers.

Frankly speaking, everything on the US carriers really sucked. Big time.

From seating space, to inflight entertainment, to quality and customer service of flight crew and even the baggage unit, hospitality, food ...everything failed miserably.

Seating space is crammed. You can feel the front seat right smack on your face. And I mean really right smack and even more so if the passenger in front had adjusted his seat to lean backwards. Your knees will touch the seats that it will be hell to just move out to the loo especially when you are on long flight and have a kid with you. So it's better to get the aisle seat.

Inflight entertainment. When most flights have upgraded to touchscreen monitor and have continuous and uninterrupted entertainment, the US Airlines in general, expect us to watch the movies at their own timing, not ours. When I thought that Americans are technologically more advance, their aircrafts, however, are behind many Jurassic years away. The remote control at the side is not covered unlike JAL so most often our arm would have pressed onto the keypads and accidentally change the channel or volume. This can be irritating not only to you but if you unknowingly pressed on your neighbour's remote. The aircrafts do not even have games to entertain those who do not want to watch the movie or listen to the radio. At least, with games, it will help to keep kids entertain on long flights. Talking about kids, they are not very kid friendly. They don't provide complimentary toys or games or snacks for the kids much less smile at anyone of them or assist to make a crying infant and a stressed passenger comfortable. I sense that kids are more of a pest than anything else to the crew.

Quality of crew. First thing, you don't really get good-looking stewards or stewardesses but that does not matter if you can work but if you are also overweight and really old and does not look like you can stand for very long, it is a wonder whether you are of any help. One thing for sure, unlike other airlines, the crew on the US airlines do not offer help with your luggage. To hell if you are struggling, they will not bother. Usually, during boarding, the crew are hardly in sight or you may spot two of them happily yakking or gossiping together while a passenger is struggling with his or her luggage.

And I can tell you I have met many downright RUDE airline crew from American Airline as well as from the other US airlines. With the exception of one or two smiley crews, perhaps the ones that I encountered are those who are either waiting for retirement, or the work is no longer enjoyable to them. To these crew, may I suggest that they should just get themselves grounded or work in a non-customer service department. Without them, at least the flying experience will be much more pleasurable.

Once on a Continental flight, after having made my halal food request a few days earlier, this particular stewardess said rudely that I did not make the request, she does not have anything for me so point blank, she told me that it's either I eat or don't. And to think that the airline that I took before that connecting Continental flight, which is United Airline had my halal food so I was surprised that Continental could have blundered that and blamed it on me. On top of that, they did not even offer an alternative until I suggest whether my son and I could have some roll and butter.

At another time on another US airline that I cannot remember which one, this steward was stumped when we asked for our halal food, because according to him, he had asked us earlier and we told him that we didn't want to eat. My husband and I looked at each other and wondered when did he ask us. He was upset and I don't understand why and went to the galley to get our food at the same time complaining to his colleague loudly about us.

On American Airline, I heard this rather rude stewardess speaking in high tone to a passenger who could hardly speak English. In a very loud and sarcastic voice, she said, "I cannot understand WHAT you are talking about." Opening the foil on the food, "You want this or this?" "WHAT?" "WHAT?" "YOU DONT WANT TO EAT?" "FINE!!!" and she stomped off. Is this the way they treat passengers or is this the way they treat Asian passengers? And I can vividly remember her name.

Again on AA, my husband was asked by a stewardess, "We have pork. You either eat it or you don't." Mindless people! Clearly, she had served us our halal meal earlier so I think she is probably suffering from selective amnesia. Then there is something really wrong with their recruitment strategy.

Another time on AA, another stewardess kicked my leg twice and at both times without apologising. Something was on the floor but she couldn't just pick it up and yet she just brushed it off with her foot and kicked my leg instead while I was snoozing.

And the food is downright miserable, deplorable and horrible. When halal food is available, it is often the same white pita bread, weird tasting curry tofu, sour tomato eggplant and some bland yellow rice. Sometimes some "grass" is included. For heaven's sake, we are not vegetarians. The US airlines forgot that when we request for halal food, it will mean that all our food on that flight whether breakfast, snacks, tea or dinner will have to be halal as well. It only happens on US airlines somehow. Most often the snacks given to us are not halal as these would be the same snacks given to every one else and these are usually pork, chicken or beef sandwich. I think this is a case of blatant ignorance and total insensitivity on the part of the airline management to cater to the varied needs of their passengers.

Most of the other airlines fare much better than any US airlines, that's for sure. For now though, I believe Emirates will definitely give SIA a run for their money. While I find that JAL and Korean Air have rather good inflight entertainment and "dainty, polite" crew, I find that SIA crew is a bit "crass" these days, but food and hospitality is still the best. The crew on Air Mauritius is rather "snooty" but Virgin's crew is "hilariously weird" or is it "weirdly hilarious" while Qantas and British, are "politely snobbish".

US airlines better buck up or maybe not...

My transit story

My video and stills camcorder decide to go awol on me, so I can't upload any pictures for the moment. So here's my transit story.

What was supposed to be a 3 hour transit at Narita Airport in Japan for our connecting flight back to Dallas, Fortworth became a 3 day transit instead.

We boarded JAL from Changi Airport at 6.35 am and by the time we were reaching Narita, we were told that the airport was congested because of flight delays etc. That particular Saturday, according to news we heard later, was one of the worst snow fall day in Narita, whereby the airport personnel were not equipped to handle the deicing and so on. So we circled the sky for about an hour. When the aircraft was finally given the green light to land, there was no parking space. Initially we were so excited seeing snow fall and the airport blanketed in white. But after sitting in the airplane for two more hours without a parking space and our bodies and butt were already aching from the long flight, we panicked knowing that we might miss our connecting flight to Dallas. Then again, we prayed, if there were a lot of delays, probably the flight to Dallas would be delayed as well. We knew that we were not the only one on connecting flights so that was sort of a relief in that sense.

Three hours later, we ran out of the airplane and were making our biggest strides ever. Our American Airline connecting flight was departing at 7.30 pm delayed by 10 minutes so here we are queuing for our boarding pass at only 7.20 pm. We caught our breath and when we saw the flight time changed to 8.30pm, we were a little relief. At least we had time to go to the restroom and freshened up a little.

8.30 pm came and nothing happens. All the passengeres were lingering restlessly, and finally an announcement came that says the American Airline flight to Dallas was cancelled, and all the passengers were required to queue again at the counter to get their next ticket or boarding passes for whatever flights available for the next day.

We were all so exhausted and hungry. While Tahir went to queue, Afzal and me find a seating spot for ourselves. Then we heard that all the other flights were cancelled too. The boarding area were crowded with passengers. BUT what was so irritating was Singapore Airlines had constant announcements asking their passengers to get snacks, refreshments (hot and cold beverage), even phonecards and later sleeping bags. American Airline (AA) did not make any announcement and did not offer anything and Tahir was still queuing until he ached and asked me to take his place for a while. Three hours later, closed to midnight, he finally got a pass for the next day's flight at 10.30 am. I just could not understand why it took so long for American Airline to process that while I'm assuming that SIA just took the same lot of passengers from the same delayed flight to the next day without having to queue again.

Then it really irks me that AA did not offer sleeping bags much less accomodation. Almost every other passenger had a sleeping bag with food. Those who doesn't, at least have blankets with food from Cathay Pacific. What is AA doing? Nothing!

I even went up to Singapore Airlines counter and offered to pay for the cup noodles but they would not let me. At least they took care of their passengers' interest first. So my son slept on the hard cold seats. We did not even have jackets with us because we thought that by the time we reached Mobile, we will be able to withstand the cold and jumped into our car and headed home. A kind passenger seating opposite us offered a Cathay Pacific blanket so I covered my son with that. Tahir slept sitting down, while I had an extra seat to put my legs up and slept in an almost foetal position.

We couldn't sleep properly though, and we could hear some snores from the warm bagged up passengers. When Afzal woke up wet from his pee, I changed him to the extra clothings that I brought only for him. So we waited again. When morning came, Singapore Airlines again made an announcement asking their passengers to get breakfast from them plus hot beverages, an amenity bag and what not. We were waiting for at least something from AA but they did not bother. All there gave was just a tray of orange and apple juices and even then, we had to figure it out ourselves. I think AA was too ashamed to even announce that, which definitely pales in comparison to what SIA gave their passengers.

I took a long walk with Afzal to find some edible proper food somewhere, and we end up on a long queue just to pay for chocolate flavoured Poka biscuits and Pringles. All the time I was cursing AA in my head for their lack of customer service, then another kind passenger gave me a US$10 voucher that I could use to pay for the food and this time the voucher was from Northwest Airline. I thanked the Vietnamese guy but it made me want to curse AA again. Can't they even think of something to make their passenger feel a little better?

By 9.30 am, SIA had their passengers boarded and left. 10.30 am came and then we were told the flight was delayed to 12 noon. I don't know what to feel anymore.

12 noon came and we were waiting to board the flight. We were the first in line because we had a child with us, BUT we were not allowed to enter because our tickets were not valid. Huh??? We did not have boarding passes. Tahir sweared that those were the only tickets given to him and the AA personnel at the counter told him those were all he needed to board the airplane.I was pissed with my own husband then when we had to wait by the side and let the other passengers enter one by one leaving us stranded there but then there were other angry passengers too who could not board the plane. There were also passengers who were already in the airplane but were offloaded because AA overbooked the seats. I went to the departing counter myself and raised my voice, "My husband queued three hours last night and you gave us this, and you told us that was all we needed!" And all AA could say was "We're sorry, there was no excuse on our part for that mistake." Argghhhh!!!!!! They made the mistake and we had to pay for it.

The airline personnel took the stranded passengers back to the AA counter to queue again for another flight out. This time around I made sure I was at the counter so that I can say a piece of my mind, knowing that hubby wouldn't rattle and nag at them as much as I would. There were other flights in the afternoon but to Chicago and San Francisco or somewhere else but we had to be on standby because the flights, according to them, were all fully booked. I told them "we were not going to be on standby. You better give us confirmed seats." Confirmed seats would have to be for the next day at 7.30pm. Well, I am not staying another night at this airport! (and I rattled about how they did not even bother to give us sleeping bags and food and expect us to stay at the airport again. We have not even showered and everything...blah, blah, blah) But the people at the counter were Japanese and they were polite despite my ramblings and anger so they put us up at a hotel. We had to clear immigration but without our luggage because the luggages were on holding somewhere and it would be a hassle. So we left the airport, no luggage, waiting for the shuttle bus in the freezing cold to bring us to the hotel. At least I felt a little bit better, because I sorely need to shower and a comfortable place to rest. We did not have extra clothings (at least I have extra undies) so we slept in the sleeping robe provided while I made Afzal slept only in his brief, and cover him with the blanket. He was so malu at first. Well, we told him we got to survive. At least he has an extra set of clothings that I washed and dried.

Since we had some time that Monday morning, we took a bus from the hotel to the nearest shopping centre and was there for three hours before we went back to the hotel at 2pm. We bought jackets for ourselves. Once we were back at the hotel, we showered but had to put on our since Saturday clothes and left the hotel for the airport at 4 pm rather early, because we just cannot wait to go home. Tahir missed his work and Afzal already missed school.

But when we reached the airport, we were told that the 7.30 pm flight will be delayed till the next day at 11.00 am. My goodness? Are we going to be stranded here forever? What the (whatever) is AA doing? They blamed it on the airport for the deicing was taking longer than expected, blah, blah, blah. I think it is all bull. If SIA flight could leave at 9.30 am why couldn't AA? Because AA just did not try hard enough. This time Tahir lost his patience. They cannot even transfer us to a different airline because according to them, every flights were all fully-booked. Though we complained because of their lack of customer service, she just nodded and I felt that it was pointless arguing. All they could do was to put us back to the hotel. We would have worn the same clothes for another day, and would AA compensate for all these - the fact that we had to buy new jackets, a top, the meals that were not provided etc etc ....

We met some other passengers that were pissed too but they felt sorrier for us because we had been delayed for three nights.

So finally the next day, we boarded the 11 am flight to Dallas Fortworth tapi apakan daya, sudah jatuh ditimpa tangga. Bila kita sampai Dallas, kita kena check out the luggage through customs and checked in again. But of course, luggage were missing.

Itu satu hal. Paspot saya dan suami tidak ada hal tapi entahlah kenapa, paspot anak buat hal. Padahal bukan kali pertama keluar masuk US. Dah masuk tiga kali dah. Pegawai imigresen kata "case of mistaken identity". Kena masuk bilik supaya pegawai lain boleh check lebih terperinci lagi. Nak mistaken identity dengan siapa? Kalau termistake dengan nama terrorist pun, pleaselah, tak tengokke budak tu belum masuk 6 tahun lagi.

Jadi terpaksalah tunggu. Darah nak menyirap pun dah tak boleh. Flight ke Mobile lagi sejam, dan kita seharusnya check-in setengah jam lagi. Setengah jam kemudian baru dapat paspot, terlari-lari dari satu terminal ke satu terminal, sampai kat boarding gate tercungap-cungap, nasib baik tak tertinggal kapalterbang kali ini. Kalau tertinggal, I would be lost for words.

Dah ditimpa tangga, tergolek-golek pulak. Sampai Mobile, kita kena lapor tentang luggage yang hilang, tapi rupa-rupanya luggage sudah sampai sehari sebelum tetapi di dalam kondisi yang tak menyenangkan. Garis dan ada koyak sedikit. Malas nak cakap. Nak ambil kereta sewa terus balik rumah, tidur sudah. Tetapi apabila sampai di tempat kaunter kereta sewa, kami diberitahu kereta sewa tidak ada sebab reservasi kami 21 hb dan kereta sewa tersebut dah keluar sebab kita tak confirm. Kita sampai 24 hb. Jadi kita terpaksa tunggu beberapa hari untuk kereta tersebut. Tak tahu nak marah siapa. Suami ke? Sebab taknak talipon tukar reservasi. Alahai.

Jadi, tunggulah teksi yang macam buah tak jatuh kat situ. Bila teksi datang, pulang rumah, muka ronyok dan hati bonyok, terus mandi, unpack sikit dan tidur...lepas tu anak pun start demam.

Still recuperating...

It will take at least 2 weeks for me to recover fully from this jetlag and all the emotional exhaustion. When most people would have travel back to their home country maybe once in two or three years, we have done that 3 times in 8 months. I'm not complaining to be back but the distance is taking a toll on me and even Afzal, what's when we were on one of the WORST airline ever, and that is American Airline! That is another story altogether. We were supposed to reached Mobile on the evening of 21st January after leaving Singapore on 21st early morning (Mobile is 14 hours behind time) but only came back on 24th January. You would never have guessed where we were for that 3 days...blog soon!

Anyway, dear Afzal came down with high fever for three nights after that, and I was feeling really sorry for him. For both me and hubby, our body clockwork was just not in sync with the central time here. For the last three days, we all slept on the carpeted floor in the living room huddled together under one big blanket, pillows and the cushions from the sofa so that we are within reach of Afzal. Besides the kool fever on his forehead, he had two types of fever medication, a pink and an orange liquid, the orange is to be used if his fever is above 38.5 degrees C and many times, his fever reaches 39.6 degrees C. I also standby a towel and a bowl of water so that I can sponge him throughout the night.

Today he is better, because he has asked for food and eating them. You know he is still unwell when he has no appetite for all the things he love to eat.

And I can't upload pictures from my Sharp Digital Camcorder because of the dew in it wherever it is. I hate this because everytime we went to a cold weather place, the dew comes in and I just could not use the video function and neither could I snap stills freely. Even after "hairdrying" it, sometines it works, and still at most times, it doesn't. Maybe it's time to invest in a good digital still camera. And maybe a separate videocam. Or maybe someone out there know of a good model that works in both cold and dry weathers. Sigh!

The first time I met him...

... was probably in October or November 1998. I was nervous and anxious, and my heart was beating really fast as my steps got closer to the meeting place. Doning a simple and yet stylish purple baju kurung, I had to make a good first impression. There I stood at the staircase landing, breathing heavily and rubbing my chest as if to calm my nerves before I turned the corner to be led to the house where I would be meeting him for the first time.

The door opened. A young girl in a traditional purple baju kurung greeted me. The girl was my boyfriend's youngest sister. The boyfriend that would become my husband now. I came into the house and saw my future in-laws. I salam both my future mak and ayah. No small talk, no interrogation, and all I was asked to do was eat. So I ate the mee siam kuah and ayam goreng, not much though, because I cannot feel the hunger. But soon the night was over and I thought, this was not so bad after all. I was ready to leave and as I salam both of them, ayah said, "Saya cuma nak yang terbaik untuk anak saya." Those words were enough to drown all the other words that he said after that. Those words felt heavy on me. Those were his killer words. I left the house feeling lousy and unsure of myself. Would I be able to be the best wife for his son? Would I be the best daughter-in-law for him?

That was my father-in-law. That was my first meeting of him and it was enough to instil a kind of fear or respect for that man. Hailing from Kelantan, he had traditional values and was very strong on Malay adat. I remembered the day of the merisik or maybe meminang, when ayah would open the greeting with a pantun in the likes of "...menyunting bunga di taman ..." something that I know my side of the family would rather go straight to the point instead of using such flowery language.

When we had our first house, we invited ayah to be the first to open the door to our apartment. I don't really know what the rules were, but I supposed it was something my husband had to do. It was also to show him that we respect him in some way. And he went into our house first, offering his prayers before the rest of us stepped in.

Ayah was strict when it comes to adat and respect for one's elders. He was a meticulous man as well, who expects high standards of hygiene in the home and on oneself. And when it comes to food, that is one area he would not stinge on. To him, good food with great hospitality is likened to the honour of the man and his family.

I somehow tended to believe that my husband, who is not very close to ayah as he is to mak, has many similar traits with ayah that he would like to believe. The only thing that I let my husband see is the occasional grievances that mak will feel because of ayah's insensitivity to mak and I hope that my husband will not do the same to me. I would gently remind my husband how sad that made mak and I would feel the same too if my husband did that as well.

Other than that, for all the similarities and differences that I and ayah had, eventhough I may not have totally agree with his ways, I have never disobey or disrespect him or the adat that he so cherished and valued. I also hope that I have been the best daughter-in-law that he could have for his eldest son. When we were leaving for the States after our second trip back home, ayah told me silently and emotionally at the airport that "Ayah yakin dengan (my name)". That was enough to make me feel that I have done something right with my husband and my son for him to have the "yakin" or confidence in me.

The house is now empty and quiet without him. The loss is felt for his presence is so strong and so impactful in our lives even in mine for whom I have only known him for seven plus years, what's more for those lives he had shaped and changed for the last 40 or so years that he was married to mak, or the 62 years he had known many others.

To ayah, may he rest in peace and may Allah bless his soul and offer him a place in Jannah, and I thank him from the bottom of my heart for his yakin in me.

Alfatihah.

What's Cooking?

School has started again after a short winter break, and off to school Afzal went this morning with a full load in his Batman's lunchbox - a small Glad tupperware of spaghetti bolognaise which we had for lunch and dinner the previous day, spaghetti in a zipper bag with an overdose of parmesan cheese that he so loves, four chocolate chip cookies, a small pack of Ranch flavored chips, a cup of jelly and his tumbler of water. And I baked 8 bite-sized tomato and cheese pizza rolls for his breakfast in which he ate 7 (because I ate one) with chocolate milk. And he was still feeling a lil bit hungry. A neighbor called to say that the Dad is sending the kids to school today so Afzal had one hour to linger in the house with tv as his entertainment and feeling a lil bit hungry. I kinda felt like eating mee hoon goreng pedas so in a magical instant, I fried the mee hoon goreng with cili, with added squids. I had my breakfast and Afzal was chipping in as I suap him with the mee hoon. "Enough Afzal, this is so pedas. You might have a stomach ache." "I love pedas" so says Afzal and true enough, he had to go to the loo.

After Afzal left, the house was quiet again. Well, at least I could have full use of the laptop. Oops, did I just sat that? Notty mummy!

There goes my day as I wondered what I should be doing, but I guess, this year I may have a purpose. It is still in germination so until then, until it really comes into fruition, then I may tell the world. For now this morning, I'm happily chatting with a friend in Germany, and my littlest brother in Singapore. Hooray for technology that can bridge people from different universe on one plane! When you're chatting, blogging, surfing, writing or doing some creative work like uploading pictures from your camera or designing a worksheet for your child, time just whizzes by and you realise that you need to cook dinner for your family. Afzal will be home by 4 pm so I must prepare our meals by then. So what shall I cook today? I've taken out the chicken and the leftover squids that I used for my mee hoon goreng ingredients. But I still have not decided what the dishes will be. Arghhh, this is one life of the sahm that just does not fit me - "thinking what to cook". To some, it's a no brainer but to me it's definitely something I have to plan. So I look at this slip of paper I have on the fridge, basically all the food that I have cook before since three weeks ago and I am wondering whether I should just repeat one or try a new recipe. Too much hard work to try a new recipe and I don't have the time, the mood or the ingredients. So I culled whatever I can from the fridge, and voila, I whipped a potful of green curry chicken and squid sambal. That's it. Lovely.

Friday evening, hubby company is hosting a dinner at some seafood restaurant in Fairhope, Daphne, about 45 minutes drive from our home. Hooray again as it means I don't have to cook for that day. At most, I will just make burgers, finger foods or nasi goreng for lunch. These I can handle. But before anyone thinks the seafood is like pari bakar, black pepper crab, sweet sour grouper, kailan or kangkong belacan, you will be so wrong! Seafood is probably boiled or grilled and definitely nothing pedas.

Then next week, it will be the 10th of January, the day of Eid dul Adha, and I am wondering whether I am expected to have a spread of feast. Hubby is working the night shifts on 9th and 10th so maybe he will not bother so much. I will be alone at home on Eid, and will be loyally "laptoping". If I'm in the mood, then maybe I'll cook some dishes that can safely be categorised as "Raya-able". Oh well, we shall see...

Until then.

The white mist came

There was crackling sound outside the apartment and I decided to peep through the blinds. Darkness was what I saw, nothing else. The digital clock showed 3 minutes past 12. I opened the balcony door and the sight that welcomed me was white mist, like as if I was living in the clouds. The mist enveloped the whole apartment. Was it raining? I thought. It was not very chilly but the parapet was a little wet, more so like dew drops after a night of condensation. There were still some crackling sounds, but I saw no activity in sight. It must have been some private celebration somewhere, that there were no fireworks to illuminate the dark night. It felt distant on a cold, quiet and stark morning of 2006. I was alone on the balcony watching the white mist amidst the darkness.

The phone rang early this morning. It brought news of hope. Mankind may have made his decision but only Allah wills it. And He has given a new year for all of us. Insya Allah and Alhamdullillah, I felt calm and full of gratitude. Gratitude to Him and also to those who have made prayers for us, Jazakallahu Khairan. May Allah give you the best rewards. I humbly and unabashly continue to seek everyone's prayers for ayah's well-being and for the woman who loves him so much. Without mak's love and determination to push on for alternative medicines, we might have just surrender his fate to the doctor's predictions. This is a time of great test that Allah has given to each of us. When we believe in Him and his qadaq and qadar, we will then learn to appreciate the reasons for every unfortunate circumstances that have befallen us. Like the saying, behind every grey cloud, there's a silver lining and perhaps that silver lining came early to me in the wee morning of the new year. Subhanallah.