My transit story

My video and stills camcorder decide to go awol on me, so I can't upload any pictures for the moment. So here's my transit story.

What was supposed to be a 3 hour transit at Narita Airport in Japan for our connecting flight back to Dallas, Fortworth became a 3 day transit instead.

We boarded JAL from Changi Airport at 6.35 am and by the time we were reaching Narita, we were told that the airport was congested because of flight delays etc. That particular Saturday, according to news we heard later, was one of the worst snow fall day in Narita, whereby the airport personnel were not equipped to handle the deicing and so on. So we circled the sky for about an hour. When the aircraft was finally given the green light to land, there was no parking space. Initially we were so excited seeing snow fall and the airport blanketed in white. But after sitting in the airplane for two more hours without a parking space and our bodies and butt were already aching from the long flight, we panicked knowing that we might miss our connecting flight to Dallas. Then again, we prayed, if there were a lot of delays, probably the flight to Dallas would be delayed as well. We knew that we were not the only one on connecting flights so that was sort of a relief in that sense.

Three hours later, we ran out of the airplane and were making our biggest strides ever. Our American Airline connecting flight was departing at 7.30 pm delayed by 10 minutes so here we are queuing for our boarding pass at only 7.20 pm. We caught our breath and when we saw the flight time changed to 8.30pm, we were a little relief. At least we had time to go to the restroom and freshened up a little.

8.30 pm came and nothing happens. All the passengeres were lingering restlessly, and finally an announcement came that says the American Airline flight to Dallas was cancelled, and all the passengers were required to queue again at the counter to get their next ticket or boarding passes for whatever flights available for the next day.

We were all so exhausted and hungry. While Tahir went to queue, Afzal and me find a seating spot for ourselves. Then we heard that all the other flights were cancelled too. The boarding area were crowded with passengers. BUT what was so irritating was Singapore Airlines had constant announcements asking their passengers to get snacks, refreshments (hot and cold beverage), even phonecards and later sleeping bags. American Airline (AA) did not make any announcement and did not offer anything and Tahir was still queuing until he ached and asked me to take his place for a while. Three hours later, closed to midnight, he finally got a pass for the next day's flight at 10.30 am. I just could not understand why it took so long for American Airline to process that while I'm assuming that SIA just took the same lot of passengers from the same delayed flight to the next day without having to queue again.

Then it really irks me that AA did not offer sleeping bags much less accomodation. Almost every other passenger had a sleeping bag with food. Those who doesn't, at least have blankets with food from Cathay Pacific. What is AA doing? Nothing!

I even went up to Singapore Airlines counter and offered to pay for the cup noodles but they would not let me. At least they took care of their passengers' interest first. So my son slept on the hard cold seats. We did not even have jackets with us because we thought that by the time we reached Mobile, we will be able to withstand the cold and jumped into our car and headed home. A kind passenger seating opposite us offered a Cathay Pacific blanket so I covered my son with that. Tahir slept sitting down, while I had an extra seat to put my legs up and slept in an almost foetal position.

We couldn't sleep properly though, and we could hear some snores from the warm bagged up passengers. When Afzal woke up wet from his pee, I changed him to the extra clothings that I brought only for him. So we waited again. When morning came, Singapore Airlines again made an announcement asking their passengers to get breakfast from them plus hot beverages, an amenity bag and what not. We were waiting for at least something from AA but they did not bother. All there gave was just a tray of orange and apple juices and even then, we had to figure it out ourselves. I think AA was too ashamed to even announce that, which definitely pales in comparison to what SIA gave their passengers.

I took a long walk with Afzal to find some edible proper food somewhere, and we end up on a long queue just to pay for chocolate flavoured Poka biscuits and Pringles. All the time I was cursing AA in my head for their lack of customer service, then another kind passenger gave me a US$10 voucher that I could use to pay for the food and this time the voucher was from Northwest Airline. I thanked the Vietnamese guy but it made me want to curse AA again. Can't they even think of something to make their passenger feel a little better?

By 9.30 am, SIA had their passengers boarded and left. 10.30 am came and then we were told the flight was delayed to 12 noon. I don't know what to feel anymore.

12 noon came and we were waiting to board the flight. We were the first in line because we had a child with us, BUT we were not allowed to enter because our tickets were not valid. Huh??? We did not have boarding passes. Tahir sweared that those were the only tickets given to him and the AA personnel at the counter told him those were all he needed to board the airplane.I was pissed with my own husband then when we had to wait by the side and let the other passengers enter one by one leaving us stranded there but then there were other angry passengers too who could not board the plane. There were also passengers who were already in the airplane but were offloaded because AA overbooked the seats. I went to the departing counter myself and raised my voice, "My husband queued three hours last night and you gave us this, and you told us that was all we needed!" And all AA could say was "We're sorry, there was no excuse on our part for that mistake." Argghhhh!!!!!! They made the mistake and we had to pay for it.

The airline personnel took the stranded passengers back to the AA counter to queue again for another flight out. This time around I made sure I was at the counter so that I can say a piece of my mind, knowing that hubby wouldn't rattle and nag at them as much as I would. There were other flights in the afternoon but to Chicago and San Francisco or somewhere else but we had to be on standby because the flights, according to them, were all fully booked. I told them "we were not going to be on standby. You better give us confirmed seats." Confirmed seats would have to be for the next day at 7.30pm. Well, I am not staying another night at this airport! (and I rattled about how they did not even bother to give us sleeping bags and food and expect us to stay at the airport again. We have not even showered and everything...blah, blah, blah) But the people at the counter were Japanese and they were polite despite my ramblings and anger so they put us up at a hotel. We had to clear immigration but without our luggage because the luggages were on holding somewhere and it would be a hassle. So we left the airport, no luggage, waiting for the shuttle bus in the freezing cold to bring us to the hotel. At least I felt a little bit better, because I sorely need to shower and a comfortable place to rest. We did not have extra clothings (at least I have extra undies) so we slept in the sleeping robe provided while I made Afzal slept only in his brief, and cover him with the blanket. He was so malu at first. Well, we told him we got to survive. At least he has an extra set of clothings that I washed and dried.

Since we had some time that Monday morning, we took a bus from the hotel to the nearest shopping centre and was there for three hours before we went back to the hotel at 2pm. We bought jackets for ourselves. Once we were back at the hotel, we showered but had to put on our since Saturday clothes and left the hotel for the airport at 4 pm rather early, because we just cannot wait to go home. Tahir missed his work and Afzal already missed school.

But when we reached the airport, we were told that the 7.30 pm flight will be delayed till the next day at 11.00 am. My goodness? Are we going to be stranded here forever? What the (whatever) is AA doing? They blamed it on the airport for the deicing was taking longer than expected, blah, blah, blah. I think it is all bull. If SIA flight could leave at 9.30 am why couldn't AA? Because AA just did not try hard enough. This time Tahir lost his patience. They cannot even transfer us to a different airline because according to them, every flights were all fully-booked. Though we complained because of their lack of customer service, she just nodded and I felt that it was pointless arguing. All they could do was to put us back to the hotel. We would have worn the same clothes for another day, and would AA compensate for all these - the fact that we had to buy new jackets, a top, the meals that were not provided etc etc ....

We met some other passengers that were pissed too but they felt sorrier for us because we had been delayed for three nights.

So finally the next day, we boarded the 11 am flight to Dallas Fortworth tapi apakan daya, sudah jatuh ditimpa tangga. Bila kita sampai Dallas, kita kena check out the luggage through customs and checked in again. But of course, luggage were missing.

Itu satu hal. Paspot saya dan suami tidak ada hal tapi entahlah kenapa, paspot anak buat hal. Padahal bukan kali pertama keluar masuk US. Dah masuk tiga kali dah. Pegawai imigresen kata "case of mistaken identity". Kena masuk bilik supaya pegawai lain boleh check lebih terperinci lagi. Nak mistaken identity dengan siapa? Kalau termistake dengan nama terrorist pun, pleaselah, tak tengokke budak tu belum masuk 6 tahun lagi.

Jadi terpaksalah tunggu. Darah nak menyirap pun dah tak boleh. Flight ke Mobile lagi sejam, dan kita seharusnya check-in setengah jam lagi. Setengah jam kemudian baru dapat paspot, terlari-lari dari satu terminal ke satu terminal, sampai kat boarding gate tercungap-cungap, nasib baik tak tertinggal kapalterbang kali ini. Kalau tertinggal, I would be lost for words.

Dah ditimpa tangga, tergolek-golek pulak. Sampai Mobile, kita kena lapor tentang luggage yang hilang, tapi rupa-rupanya luggage sudah sampai sehari sebelum tetapi di dalam kondisi yang tak menyenangkan. Garis dan ada koyak sedikit. Malas nak cakap. Nak ambil kereta sewa terus balik rumah, tidur sudah. Tetapi apabila sampai di tempat kaunter kereta sewa, kami diberitahu kereta sewa tidak ada sebab reservasi kami 21 hb dan kereta sewa tersebut dah keluar sebab kita tak confirm. Kita sampai 24 hb. Jadi kita terpaksa tunggu beberapa hari untuk kereta tersebut. Tak tahu nak marah siapa. Suami ke? Sebab taknak talipon tukar reservasi. Alahai.

Jadi, tunggulah teksi yang macam buah tak jatuh kat situ. Bila teksi datang, pulang rumah, muka ronyok dan hati bonyok, terus mandi, unpack sikit dan tidur...lepas tu anak pun start demam.

Still recuperating...

It will take at least 2 weeks for me to recover fully from this jetlag and all the emotional exhaustion. When most people would have travel back to their home country maybe once in two or three years, we have done that 3 times in 8 months. I'm not complaining to be back but the distance is taking a toll on me and even Afzal, what's when we were on one of the WORST airline ever, and that is American Airline! That is another story altogether. We were supposed to reached Mobile on the evening of 21st January after leaving Singapore on 21st early morning (Mobile is 14 hours behind time) but only came back on 24th January. You would never have guessed where we were for that 3 days...blog soon!

Anyway, dear Afzal came down with high fever for three nights after that, and I was feeling really sorry for him. For both me and hubby, our body clockwork was just not in sync with the central time here. For the last three days, we all slept on the carpeted floor in the living room huddled together under one big blanket, pillows and the cushions from the sofa so that we are within reach of Afzal. Besides the kool fever on his forehead, he had two types of fever medication, a pink and an orange liquid, the orange is to be used if his fever is above 38.5 degrees C and many times, his fever reaches 39.6 degrees C. I also standby a towel and a bowl of water so that I can sponge him throughout the night.

Today he is better, because he has asked for food and eating them. You know he is still unwell when he has no appetite for all the things he love to eat.

And I can't upload pictures from my Sharp Digital Camcorder because of the dew in it wherever it is. I hate this because everytime we went to a cold weather place, the dew comes in and I just could not use the video function and neither could I snap stills freely. Even after "hairdrying" it, sometines it works, and still at most times, it doesn't. Maybe it's time to invest in a good digital still camera. And maybe a separate videocam. Or maybe someone out there know of a good model that works in both cold and dry weathers. Sigh!

The first time I met him...

... was probably in October or November 1998. I was nervous and anxious, and my heart was beating really fast as my steps got closer to the meeting place. Doning a simple and yet stylish purple baju kurung, I had to make a good first impression. There I stood at the staircase landing, breathing heavily and rubbing my chest as if to calm my nerves before I turned the corner to be led to the house where I would be meeting him for the first time.

The door opened. A young girl in a traditional purple baju kurung greeted me. The girl was my boyfriend's youngest sister. The boyfriend that would become my husband now. I came into the house and saw my future in-laws. I salam both my future mak and ayah. No small talk, no interrogation, and all I was asked to do was eat. So I ate the mee siam kuah and ayam goreng, not much though, because I cannot feel the hunger. But soon the night was over and I thought, this was not so bad after all. I was ready to leave and as I salam both of them, ayah said, "Saya cuma nak yang terbaik untuk anak saya." Those words were enough to drown all the other words that he said after that. Those words felt heavy on me. Those were his killer words. I left the house feeling lousy and unsure of myself. Would I be able to be the best wife for his son? Would I be the best daughter-in-law for him?

That was my father-in-law. That was my first meeting of him and it was enough to instil a kind of fear or respect for that man. Hailing from Kelantan, he had traditional values and was very strong on Malay adat. I remembered the day of the merisik or maybe meminang, when ayah would open the greeting with a pantun in the likes of "...menyunting bunga di taman ..." something that I know my side of the family would rather go straight to the point instead of using such flowery language.

When we had our first house, we invited ayah to be the first to open the door to our apartment. I don't really know what the rules were, but I supposed it was something my husband had to do. It was also to show him that we respect him in some way. And he went into our house first, offering his prayers before the rest of us stepped in.

Ayah was strict when it comes to adat and respect for one's elders. He was a meticulous man as well, who expects high standards of hygiene in the home and on oneself. And when it comes to food, that is one area he would not stinge on. To him, good food with great hospitality is likened to the honour of the man and his family.

I somehow tended to believe that my husband, who is not very close to ayah as he is to mak, has many similar traits with ayah that he would like to believe. The only thing that I let my husband see is the occasional grievances that mak will feel because of ayah's insensitivity to mak and I hope that my husband will not do the same to me. I would gently remind my husband how sad that made mak and I would feel the same too if my husband did that as well.

Other than that, for all the similarities and differences that I and ayah had, eventhough I may not have totally agree with his ways, I have never disobey or disrespect him or the adat that he so cherished and valued. I also hope that I have been the best daughter-in-law that he could have for his eldest son. When we were leaving for the States after our second trip back home, ayah told me silently and emotionally at the airport that "Ayah yakin dengan (my name)". That was enough to make me feel that I have done something right with my husband and my son for him to have the "yakin" or confidence in me.

The house is now empty and quiet without him. The loss is felt for his presence is so strong and so impactful in our lives even in mine for whom I have only known him for seven plus years, what's more for those lives he had shaped and changed for the last 40 or so years that he was married to mak, or the 62 years he had known many others.

To ayah, may he rest in peace and may Allah bless his soul and offer him a place in Jannah, and I thank him from the bottom of my heart for his yakin in me.

Alfatihah.

What's Cooking?

School has started again after a short winter break, and off to school Afzal went this morning with a full load in his Batman's lunchbox - a small Glad tupperware of spaghetti bolognaise which we had for lunch and dinner the previous day, spaghetti in a zipper bag with an overdose of parmesan cheese that he so loves, four chocolate chip cookies, a small pack of Ranch flavored chips, a cup of jelly and his tumbler of water. And I baked 8 bite-sized tomato and cheese pizza rolls for his breakfast in which he ate 7 (because I ate one) with chocolate milk. And he was still feeling a lil bit hungry. A neighbor called to say that the Dad is sending the kids to school today so Afzal had one hour to linger in the house with tv as his entertainment and feeling a lil bit hungry. I kinda felt like eating mee hoon goreng pedas so in a magical instant, I fried the mee hoon goreng with cili, with added squids. I had my breakfast and Afzal was chipping in as I suap him with the mee hoon. "Enough Afzal, this is so pedas. You might have a stomach ache." "I love pedas" so says Afzal and true enough, he had to go to the loo.

After Afzal left, the house was quiet again. Well, at least I could have full use of the laptop. Oops, did I just sat that? Notty mummy!

There goes my day as I wondered what I should be doing, but I guess, this year I may have a purpose. It is still in germination so until then, until it really comes into fruition, then I may tell the world. For now this morning, I'm happily chatting with a friend in Germany, and my littlest brother in Singapore. Hooray for technology that can bridge people from different universe on one plane! When you're chatting, blogging, surfing, writing or doing some creative work like uploading pictures from your camera or designing a worksheet for your child, time just whizzes by and you realise that you need to cook dinner for your family. Afzal will be home by 4 pm so I must prepare our meals by then. So what shall I cook today? I've taken out the chicken and the leftover squids that I used for my mee hoon goreng ingredients. But I still have not decided what the dishes will be. Arghhh, this is one life of the sahm that just does not fit me - "thinking what to cook". To some, it's a no brainer but to me it's definitely something I have to plan. So I look at this slip of paper I have on the fridge, basically all the food that I have cook before since three weeks ago and I am wondering whether I should just repeat one or try a new recipe. Too much hard work to try a new recipe and I don't have the time, the mood or the ingredients. So I culled whatever I can from the fridge, and voila, I whipped a potful of green curry chicken and squid sambal. That's it. Lovely.

Friday evening, hubby company is hosting a dinner at some seafood restaurant in Fairhope, Daphne, about 45 minutes drive from our home. Hooray again as it means I don't have to cook for that day. At most, I will just make burgers, finger foods or nasi goreng for lunch. These I can handle. But before anyone thinks the seafood is like pari bakar, black pepper crab, sweet sour grouper, kailan or kangkong belacan, you will be so wrong! Seafood is probably boiled or grilled and definitely nothing pedas.

Then next week, it will be the 10th of January, the day of Eid dul Adha, and I am wondering whether I am expected to have a spread of feast. Hubby is working the night shifts on 9th and 10th so maybe he will not bother so much. I will be alone at home on Eid, and will be loyally "laptoping". If I'm in the mood, then maybe I'll cook some dishes that can safely be categorised as "Raya-able". Oh well, we shall see...

Until then.

The white mist came

There was crackling sound outside the apartment and I decided to peep through the blinds. Darkness was what I saw, nothing else. The digital clock showed 3 minutes past 12. I opened the balcony door and the sight that welcomed me was white mist, like as if I was living in the clouds. The mist enveloped the whole apartment. Was it raining? I thought. It was not very chilly but the parapet was a little wet, more so like dew drops after a night of condensation. There were still some crackling sounds, but I saw no activity in sight. It must have been some private celebration somewhere, that there were no fireworks to illuminate the dark night. It felt distant on a cold, quiet and stark morning of 2006. I was alone on the balcony watching the white mist amidst the darkness.

The phone rang early this morning. It brought news of hope. Mankind may have made his decision but only Allah wills it. And He has given a new year for all of us. Insya Allah and Alhamdullillah, I felt calm and full of gratitude. Gratitude to Him and also to those who have made prayers for us, Jazakallahu Khairan. May Allah give you the best rewards. I humbly and unabashly continue to seek everyone's prayers for ayah's well-being and for the woman who loves him so much. Without mak's love and determination to push on for alternative medicines, we might have just surrender his fate to the doctor's predictions. This is a time of great test that Allah has given to each of us. When we believe in Him and his qadaq and qadar, we will then learn to appreciate the reasons for every unfortunate circumstances that have befallen us. Like the saying, behind every grey cloud, there's a silver lining and perhaps that silver lining came early to me in the wee morning of the new year. Subhanallah.

Another day will pass...

...and soon it will be another year. And often at the end of the year and the onset of another, it does get you into a reflective mode. But one thing for sure, I have stop making resolutions because I will never keep them. However, I do have plans and I do have my own personal goals, but I am realistic enough to know that I may not be able to achieve these plans and goals within the year but at least in the coming few years.

Looking back at 2005, it is definitely an unusual year in many ways but it is also one of the most rewarding year. For one, I was confered my Masters of Science in Early Childhood Education from Wheelock College, Boston, Massachusetts. Yes, that studying, working, juggling wifehood and motherhood, and daughter-in-law-hood has finally paid off. I had always wanted a Masters degree one day and that resolution to actually do something about it came about only in 2000 and finally I embraced all my fears, my doubts and my insecurities and took the plunge at the end of 2003. So you know, my resolution took a couple of years to materialise. But I'm glad I did it. And I am sooooo happppppyyyyy!!!!

I have dreams of living in another country but it hadn't cross my mind that I would be living that dream in 2005 in the United States of America. But here I am living the good and laid back life of an 'expat' wife (ehem).

There were other moments when my life is not exactly rosy for me, and this year was also one of the worst time that I had to confront that moment. That painful and hurtful moment which I could still vividly recall and remember. But I am thankful that God gave me extreme strength and unwavering patience to see it through and still remain in one piece. Alhamdullillah. I continue to pray that that moment will not enter my life anymore. It will pass, really pass. Full stop. Period.

I quit my 'glamourous' job in June 2004 and for 7 months that I was not working but studying, I was the dutiful wife and mother, and also the unofficial chauffeur. The issue of not having any income of my own did bother me but that was one of the fears that I had to sort out myself and surge on with the support of my hubby. When I finally landed a job as a research associate in February 2005, I was happy and glad that this new position or career is so much in sync with the current priorities in my life and that would be a stepping stone to something greater and wonderful. But alas, that lasted for four months because I dutifully again, followed my hubby to the American soil. Once again without my own income.

I have no regrets, but much to be grateful for despite not having much income as I used to. Maybe He knows best and though we have sacrificed so much, I am satisfied to say that my not working has not been a financial strain to my hubby or our family. Of course, we could have so much more so that we can enjoy more things in life and settle any outstanding mortgage earlier, but I think my life has been richer for the lack of it. The only thing I feel is that I can offer so much of my time into good use like volunteering in my son's school but the lack of transportation has impeded my mobility. I write Malay stories but have not found an outlet for it to be published and shared. I wish I could contribute my intellectual thoughts somewhere but for now, only this blog and my multiply site have been my intellectual (and maybe emotional and social) playground. No matter what, cos the time will come when it comes, I'm loving this 'being at home in US' opportunity as it will not come that many times in anyone's lifetime. I don't know how 2006 will turn out to be but I know for sure, certain important things need to be done especially when we return to Singapore, and there's a whole long list waiting to be checked and deleted.

Have a happy and blessed new year to all. May He grant all your prayers and doas and may life be what you wish and pray it to be. Insya Allah.

What shall I talk about?

At times I feel that I have so much to say but when I hit the keypads, the words get totally lost. Things seemed to be churning in my mind, but how I wished I can just spit it out on print. Alas, it is not so.

So where shall I start? Shall I talk about my trip to Atlanta, where we found a Mustafa-Center-like Global Mall in the heart of the city. And when I say Mustafa-Center-like meaning it was a little building that has everything from Hollywood Videos to tosei and punjabi suits and Indian salons. It's so weird somehow, like suddenly stepping into a different place and time zone amidst the few minutes drive to CNN studio center, and billboards of "Daisy does America" and "Anderson Cooper on 360".

Or shall I talk about how I met an old friend online? I knew she has been a blogger but I did not decide to drop by her blog and comment until yesterday, and how the past just jolted back into my memory. The past about how I was still single and trying to make it in KL and I met her. She was also trying to break into the KL scenes plus a few personal reasons of her own, and spent a night at my apartment. Alas, KL was too much of a culture shock for me. Truly, despite being Malay and having almost the same identity in many ways, it was a culture shock that I returned to Singapore after only five months. Then we met again and worked together in many tv related projects, that we stayed overnight in an editing suite in a Joo Chiat shophouse, and told our life stories to each other. Got cheated out of our pay and all that. But after reading her blog, it's amazing how life has turned out to be good for her in many ways. Alhamdullillah, and I'm so happy for her.

Or maybe I should just rant about my transit life here in Mobile, or about my dearest son who is tirelessly playful but just sometimes too much for me to handle, or about my own paranoia and insecurities as a mom, or even mundane stuff about the suddenly hot winter in Mobile. Perhaps I should just count my blessings, and instead of ranting, feel grateful for the things that I have and have experienced, for there would be many others who will envy the position and the current *profession* that I am in.

Whatever it is, the grass always seems greener on the other side, but I find comfort in a borrowed phrase, "because we are not there to see it on that side of the fence."

Amin.

Autumn... and winter....

Now you see it...........


Now you don't.........(the leaves I mean)





Here the father and son are at the Centennial Olympic Park in Atlanta, Georgia. We were there over the Christmas weekend, just to soak in the atmosphere. Downtown Atlanta was like a ghost town because of the holiday but still it looks more fun than Mobile. There's the Georgia Aquarium, touted to be the biggest in the world (?). World of Coke, a sort of museum dedicated to the origins and evolvement of the cola. I later found out that the founder of coke was born and buried in Georgia. We toured the CNN studio, and got a snapshot with Larry King.

Love that bouquet ...

Me hubby gave me this bouquet on Christmas eve, not for any occasion though, but more so to say he is sorry and that he loves me. He's not a flower or gift-giving sort of person, and often times, I have to tell him point blank that my birthday is coming or that I would love that stalk of rose. But this around, nothing was said, because that was it, it was a couple of days of me giving him the silent treatment, and I guess he knew that it's time to make peace. You know, moi is very giving and loving sort of person and sometimes a big hug or just a stalk of rose can melt all the hurt and anger away. So to all men, it works. And to me hubby, you know *my promise* to you.

Appreciating the beauty of nature...

Nasi Lemak, Mee Maggie and McDonald

These are some of my son's fave food, albeit not healthy ones. Before we came to Alabama, we have 'psychoed' him that he will not be able to eat nasi lemak that easily. "Mummy cannot just go to the shop and buy. Mummy will have to cook for you but mummy cannot do it all the time." Nasi lemak is easy to make but I find that the sambal is the most tedious. You just have to get the right concoction of dried red chillies ground to a paste, correct amount of belacan, onions, tamarind juice, salt and sugar. And the aroma will penetrate every corner of your kitchen and house, sinking itself even into your clothes and your sofa. The best sambal I think, will be able to make you sneeze. And furthermore I have to import the chillies and belacan. I've tried one of the dried chillies here but it just didn't work. And Afzal loves sambal. All he needs is plain white rice (not necessarily the coconut milk flavored rice), sambal and that succulent crispy ayam goreng. And that is nasi lemak for him.

We have also brainwashed Afzal that he is not able to eat as much at McDonald like he would be able to in Singapore because the McDonald here is not halal. Either we are very successful in the brainwashing or Afzal is very adaptable and whenever he wants McDonald, he will only ask for fries and occasionally the chocolate sundae. Sometimes either me or my husband will purposely ask the other whether we want a cheeseburger or chicken, and Afzal will immediately retort in horror, "you cannot eat the burger and chicken here, it is not halal!" There you go, our little but very important talk have sunk into his brain cells.

When our stock of Maggie Mee runs dry, we will just go to Walmart and buy shrimp ramen and all of us are happy with that.

I always pack Afzal his lunch to school as we know the school does not serve halal food. And since the queue for breakfast is very long and as Ms Smith, his homeroom teacher is not there to watch over him when he has breakfast, I will make sure that Afzal has a good breakfast at home before he leaves for school. But unknowingly to me, sometimes when I asked him what he did in school and how was his day, he would tell me that he had breakfast again in school. I know my Afzal has a good appetite but I was horrified when he told me, rather innocently, that he had sausage! So petrified Mummy will tell Afzal that sausage is not halal. And Afzal's reply puts me in cognitive disequilibrium when he says, "But Mummy, sausage is not meat." Oops. Oops. Oops. Guess I did not foresee this situation. My blunder is whenever I cook beef, I would tell him it's meat. So he must have been thinking, "Sausage is not meat because meat is that stuff my mummy cook, so sausage must be something else that I can eat." So Mummy has to tell Afzal that sausage is meat and all the other stuff that is meat like beef, burger, chicken, nuggets, etc etc and these stuff are not halal in school but if Afzal wants to eat sausage, beef, burger, chicken, nuggets, etc etc, Mummy will buy, make and pack them for Afzal. So I put him in cognitive disequilibrium by changing his meaning of things, but then again he will soon be in "equilibrium" once he makes sense of all these. We've also educated him about gelatin so he cannot just buy any pack of candies without checking the ingredients. However, when we do not want him to eat too many candies, we would just sneakily told him there's gelatin in it, more so for his health benefit. It works because he would put the pack back but he will soon pick another and asked us "Got gelatin?". So can't be all candies have gelatin, isn't it?

It's hard especially when he has a party in school and will be getting loads of chocolates and candies, and I cannot be telling Ms Smith, please check for the gelatin, that emulsifier or even that lecithin etc etc. Ms Smith has asked me whether she can just take out the pepperoni from the pizza for Afzal. I don't know whether there was any look of "horror" on my face, but I would just say rather calmly, "oh no...he's fine with just the chips and the biscuits." But kind Ms Smith thinks that it will not be fair to Afzal and goes to another class in search of a slice of cheese pizza.

We want to instil these important values in Afzal and at the same time we do not want him to miss out on the fun in school or be alienated from society at large. It will be challenging anywhere we are in the world but as long as there are people who are kind and respectful to our values, it will be much easier. I also believed that as long as we are sincere in this, God will help us to make it easier.

I have told Ms Smith about Ramadan and fasting, and she openly admitted that it was the first time she ever heard of such a thing. When we celebrated Eid or Aidilfitri or Hari Raya whatever the names you call it in different parts of the world, I gave her a bagful of goodies that she was so happy with it that she lets Afzal share his festival with the rest of the class. She knows that Afzal does not celebrate christmas and when the class was making christmas tree ornaments, Afzal made a similar looking ornament but it was a fridge magnet instead. When we asked Afzal why he did not make the tree ornament, he would just say, "because I don't celebrate christmas, I celebrate Hari Raya." Good job Afzal! And thank you Ms Smith!




Afzal-made-fridge-magnet

Whenever the phone rings...

...and it has nothing to do with my drama-mama entries, I do sometimes get into a panic mode. I fear getting that phonecall. That phonecall that will mean someone really close to us, especially to my significant other, will ... Seeing my ever so reserved and steely other half crumbles to tears pained me. And being thousand of miles away on the other side of the globe does not console the heart and the soul, not only of ours but also of his family, who are mine as well.

Mak is taking care of ayah, being with him since evening until subuh without even taking her dinner, and considering her own health. Her other children are worried not only for ayah but mak as well and smsed their abang long who is like 28 hours plane ride away. All the adiks know that mak always listen to abang, but this time around, the always so steely mak herself breaks down, with little comfort from abang. Things happen too drastically and unexpectedly in the last few months. Abang got a great job with a training stint in the US for at least one year, and between the first trip home and the second, which was like only a short span of 2 months plus, ayah's health took a drastic turn. At 68, he has the usual old age ailments, but he was never in and out of the hospital but unexpectedly, he was admitted to hospital a week after we return from our first trip home and it has never been the same.

The toughest part is knowing that all your adiks and their families could spend their time with ayah and yet you are not able to. We were fully aware that our second trip home could be our last meeting then, but we choose to believe that we will meet again when we return from this stint.

Please pray for ayah, mak and for us.

Commercial Break : Blogger's Block

My last two entries were something that came up because of a blogger's block. Really. My life is not than suspenseful. Anyway, my friend, H, emailed me and said that she had not seen any entry since my trip to Florida. I was tired from all the holidaying and like I told her I do not want to sound like a desperate housewife on my blog but I guessed I just did. In my desperate attempt to blog, I created a fact-fictional story of me ...hahaha. Lame, isn't it?

And now I'm getting the same block again at how I should continue that "suspenseful" drama without being annoying or anti-climatic. Think, think, think.

"Hello?"

"Hello?" I answered nervously not knowing what kind of call I would be receiving. Would it be from the significant other? Would it be some good news, or bad news from that faraway place I called home? Or would it be some caller who had dialed my number wrongly? Or maybe one of those unsolicited spam calls. Or maybe some crackhead who just have got nothing better to do and decided to scare me to bits.

"Hello?" There was a momentary uneasy silence on both ends of the line. I could hear my own breathing and the beatings in my heart. The few seconds of silence in anticipation of a response to my simple greeting was like light years of waiting. I had enough. "Hello?" It was a harsh hello with the intended meaning that "if you do not want to talk, don't call." The line went dead. My heart skipped a beat as I felt the feeling of someone hanging up on me. I wondered why. Who could that be?

Before I could even put the phone down, there was a thunderous bang on the front door. My face did a 180 degrees sharp turn towards the white wooden front door. I felt almost frozen in time and space. I could hardly move my legs for fear that the creaking sounds of the floor would be a sign that I was in the house. Despite the chilliness of the morning, beads of perspiration were running down my neck. I have heard the news just yesterday about some assault taking place around the apartment. I wish I could dial a number for help, but I do not know who or what to call. I had no one to call, not even the number of my hubby's workplace. I was helpless and felt in absolute lack of control. The pounding on the door became louder, faster and furious, and I could almost feel that the door was going to crack. I panicked...


to be continued...

As I was...

... lying on the couch, my heart was filled with restlessness. It was 9.53 am, more than two hours after my son had left for school. I had taken a shower, checked my email, ate breakfast and read a few pages of the current book that I was reading.

I was reading but absorbing nothing. I put the book down, closed my eyes, hoping that this restlessness will end...."Ring!!!!!" the phone rang unexpectantly and my heart lept. Excited and nervous, I carried myself up and almost sprang to the phone. "Hello?"


Akan Datang...jeng, jeng, jeng!

This is America!

We were at the halal meat store the other day. And while we were patiently waiting for the ever-taking-his-own-sweet-time owner to prepare our poultry, a fiery red two door undiscernable brand sportscar pulled up at the front of the shop. Out came a young man who came into the shop and asked the grocery owner for phonecards. They made their exchanges in Arabic.

So this fine modern young main in fiery red two door sportscar is of middle eastern descent, got the phone card and a bottled juice, paid money and left. I thought of making small talk with this grocery owner in order to pass the time waiting for our poultry. "He must be rich." I commented. Muslim Arab grocery owner who is a migrant himself said "No, no, no. This is America. You got plastic (ie. credit card) you can have anything."

That statement was something both my husband and I did not quite expected somehow. We both smiled widely, and just agreed with him. "This is America, land of opportunity", the ever-so-often tagline that you hear. Talking about this is America, I ever saw a granny on the news. She made the news because she invented something. A very inventive entrepreneurial granny! She came up with her invention because everytime her grandchildren go to the bathroom and pull the toilet paper, it will just roll out continuosly and that really bugs her. So granny came up with this ingenius invention that will somehow prevent the toilet paper from rolling and rolling. It will just stop at perhaps two sets of sheets and there you go, no wastage, and no horrors in the toilet. So this is America, the land of opportunity.

This is America, the land of freedom of speech. You certainly can have the luxury of speaking your mind unlike in Singapore, where a reporter dubbed it as the "Land of Nos". The strange thing about this freedom of speech is that you are able to get away even if you are a suspected or pro-terrorist as long as you say it on American soil, eventhough your very speech may threaten the security of Americans. It will be unconstitutional to condemn the person because every one has the right of freedom of speech.

The right and the freedom of speech has made many newsreaders and journalists to make their own opinions and judgements even before the person on trial is proven guilty. A case in time is Michael Jackson. A particular anchorwoman is just so full of negative opinions of MJ, that she convicted him everyday on her show. When MJ was finally acquitted, she said "I need my therapist tonight!" That was how it was for her.

It will be tough if you are one of those that does not have a mind of your own because these anchor persons are much more powerful than the political leaders because they are on air like 5 days a week on primetime.

So this is America, you can say anything and you can have everything. Of course everything will not come on your lap if you don't work hard for it. But sometimes, all it takes is a bit of luck. Take for instance, William Hung. As long as you get your well-deserved airtime and I mean you don't even have to be the winner, in fact, in his case, be a total reject. But if lady luck shines on you, contracts and deals may come your way. Take part in a reality show, be it American Idol, The Next American Top Model, Survivor, Amazing Race, The Apprentice etc and somehow or rather, you might just get noticed and the money will just start rolling in.

This is America! If you have an idea or just plain lucky, seize the moment!!!

Perhaps I should get my brain cracking and come up with something ingenius because who knows that success may come so sweet eventhough if it's just a little something for the toilet. :)

Walt Disney World, Orlando, Florida

Mess or Installation Art?

The real deal...

Singapore Math and Kitchen Table Math

I came across this blooki (part blog, part wiki, part book) called Kitchen Table Math, started by two mummies whose mission statement is to have fun, to share ways of teaching kids math and to support people who wants to help kids learn math.

I don't know whether I felt surprise or proud the fact that one of the mummies, Catherine, cited Singapore Math as a coherent curriculum. This time, to my surprise, Singapore Math Inc is a company based in Oregon, USA supplying maths textbooks and workbooks from Singapore to US parents and teachers. In fact, some users from UK as well.

Well done to maths-curriculum-made-in-Singapore for doing so well overseas!
(yet our Malay kids are not doing so well in maths, sigh.)

Ads by Google

Did you see that I have ads by google below the heading? If you drop by my blog, please click on the ads, as it may help me to generate some income, I hope. So click and keep clicking....

Aidilfitri in Singapore

We were back in Singapore for Aidilfitri, arriving at 12.55 am on 3rd Nov. Yes, on the wee morning of Aidilfitri itself. Got my brother to drive our car to the airport to fetch us and then we headed to my parents' Tampines home to surprise them. Yup, we didn't tell them that we are coming home. Mom was pleasantly surprise. Dad was shocked at first as he thought something bad happen. Why did we come back? he thought. He was a little sad that I did not call earlier especially after the last iftar. Well, now he knows I am on the plane to see him. We stayed for an hour at my parents' home as our main intention this time around was to actually see my father-in-law whose health has not been good since two months ago. We headed to Jurong at about 2 am and went to my in-laws place. They were already informed so they knew we were coming. Kinda sad and shock to see my father-in-law, who has lost a lot of weight due to his ill-health.

We stayed at my in-laws and did not do much visiting as we knew what our intentions were for coming back. I felt really glad that we were back because I get to eat good food and had good conversations with family members. There are just so many things to do, it kept me busy - tired but rejuvenated. Though I did not spend much time with my own family this time around, however, knowing that we are within close proximity helps to heal the lonely existence that I have been feeling for the past month. Though here in Mobile, there are my husband's Muslim colleagues and families, it is just not the same.

Now I'm back in Mobile again, and I don't know whether I will continue this almost lonely existence again for the next few months. I'm here because I am supporting hubby wholeheartedly with his career opportunity here. And I am happy as long as hubby is happy with his work and my son is happy at school. Because behind every successful man (men), there is his one and only woman! (Wife and Mummy!)This week will pass quickly, I just know it cos next Monday, we will be going to Orlando, Florida to meet my Mum and Dad!!! So akan terubatlah sedikit kesunyian ini...

Martha Stewart's Apprentice got the axed

There's not going to be a second season, and why am I not surprise? Because it lacks all the 'edge' that you can find in Trump's. To Martha, I have to say goodbye...

Daylight Saving Time

As of 1.59 am this morning, the time were changed back to 1 am instead of 2am. As a result, we are 14 hours behind Singapore instead of 13. Therefore, iftar is at 5.06pm instead of 6.06pm. In a way, we gained an hour more sleep but for those working during that night shift, they had to work an extra hour instead. As far as I understand, the time is actually reverted back to Standard Time, in other words, Daylight Saving Time ends. Daylight Saving Time will begin again in April next year.

I am wondering, if it's just bcos they wanted to save electricity, why don't they just change the timer for the road lights etc to be on instead of changing time itself? Surprisingly, it's a worldwide phenomenon except in countries near the Equator ....hmmmm

Raya Mistletoe

My very own "ketupat on the mistletoe". Looks messy rather than decorative, though. Perhaps I just don't have that decorative-touch. Or this mistletoe needs more ketupat. We'll see in the coming days whether I have the mood or the touch to recreate this "Raya Mistletoe".

Can I leak...

...about the Apprentice? For those of you in Singapore who does not want to know, don't read.

In one boardroom sitting, Trump fired all 4 apprentices. They did really badly for that Sporting Goods store, not only they did not make any sales but the sales dropped by over 30%.

Dedicated to family and friends

We appeared on Manja Nov 2005 issue page 56 with this family snapshot and a letter from Alabama to wish family and friends a Selamat Hari Raya and Maaf Zahir Batin. We hope that you guys like it!!! Enjoy!!!

The Stork delivered

Yup, Rusini has another baby girl since last Friday. Welcome to Aya Reina Rosen.

Baby Boom!

Another baby has landed...Durrah Aqilah, baby girl of proud parents, Muj and Razali. No pics yet. Rusini should also have given birth. Will deliver the news ...akan datang.

It's 10 degrees outside

... esp in the wee hours and early evening. We are getting freezing cold. Afzal has put on three layers of clothing to school.

This is the Year of Births!

The Singapore government will be one happy parent. There are just so many new births this year. Seri, Omel and now Haslina's newest bundle, baby Nurin Amirah. I know one Singaporean who gave birth in the States and another, who happens to be Rusini, who will be giving birth by end of this week. And of course, Muj's baby is also on the way...

Pretty productive year for these ladies. As for me, I must tell the Singapore government that it's not that I don't want to have a second one but it just ain't happening. Like the Malay saying, 'belum rezeki.'

October is the Month of Horrors

With Halloween around the corner, the networks are busy promoting and airing horror flicks...I just saw the trailers for some scary stuff...I can't even remember which channel and what is showing except for Sixth Sense.

With over 70 free to air channels, it is just so hard to keep track of what's showing, when, what time and on which channel. I'm still so clueless and can never find the programme that I want to watch. Maybe I'm just plain lazy to even bother to watch the tv. At least I know Ch 28 and 29 is Cartoon Network and Nickelodeon respectively but asked me which cartoons air on which station, then I don't really remember.

I'm trying to watch Supernatural, but have missed two episodes. I missed the first epi of Desperate Housewives, then there's supposed to be the latest season of Gilmore Girls which I don't even know when, what time and where is it showing. Really, I'm just not tune in...

Which desperate housewife are you?

I was just thinking to myself that whatever quiz that you take, it should reflect you, and it should not matter at which point in life you are UNLESS the change that you are going through makes you a really different person.

You see, I took this desperate housewife quiz twice before when I was still working as a research associate like just last May, and twice I was a different housewife. I was a Bree and an Edie. As I was joking to Sue, maybe I was a "Stepford-wife-wannabe with a sexy siren screaming inside waiting to get out". Now, after being a SAHM for over 4 months, I'm a Susan, "the rather neurotic mother of one" and somehow I tend to think it does reflect me now. Being at home most of the time, all the time, here makes me really neurotic, and why I say this is also because I retook the online IQ test, and guess what, my IQ score has dropped by a whopping 4 points.

I think it's because I am using less of my grey matter. I am in an environment that is less adrenalin pumping as before but not necessarily less stressful. The stress is of a different nature now. I don't feel stupid but I feel 'lack of a better use'. Frankly speaking, I don't make a good housewife in the housewifely sense...my kuah lodeh sucks, and I can train my eyes to see beyond the dirt that's accumulating at the corners of my house. Hubby has totally, and I mean totally leave all household duties to me. Maybe he helped a bit, just by folding the laundry. Even teaching Afzal has been my duty ... and I mean not only the English but the Malay and the doa ...where is hubby in this part? Other than that, I know despite being a SAHM, I think I can do more - stretch my imagination, stretch my creativity, my mind, my cerebral cortex but there isn't seem to be an outlet for all these except this blog and the other blog and this laptop that I could furiously typed. And that's about it. What an inane existence! Not for long, I hope. So maybe I have a bit of each of the housewives' desperations...HELP!

BTW, Desperate Housewives second season is now showing on ABC at 8 CT, Sundays.

October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month

I was inspired by the tv show 'Intimate portraits of Ann Curry'.

Ann Curry is a news anchor and personality at NBC, and her sister, Jean was diagnosed with breast cancer. This made Ann, who initially would never believe in using her tv power to go all out in researching about breast cancer. Introducing herself as Ann Curry but doing it for personal reasons in her research, she was able to find out about the best medicine and options for her sister Jean. Because of her fame, Ann Curry is able to promote the awareness and the fight against breast cancer. Of half Japanese origin, she is very much an all-American girl. Her rise to be a cutting edge news correspondence and anchor is truly an inspiring one.

You can find her name in Wikipedia, the free encyclopaedia at http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ann_Curry

Sam's Surf City in Pensacola, Fl

We were here the weekend just before Ramadan, and it was a swell time for all of us...Afzal and Ayah on the inflatable....

Really Chilly

Yesterday, for the first time, we turned on the heater instead of the aircon. It was really cold outside that we had to put on a sweater.

Today was sunny but there was a nice breeze...

Lame Excuse

This morning, as my little Barnacle-inspired kid is combing his hair preparing to go to school, I told him he did not split the sides properly. So I recombed his hair neatly and guessed what he said,"This is kinda lame." "What do you mean by that?" as this mom, who was NOT surprised by what he said but kinda taken aback by what he actually meant when he used that expression. The things going through my mind was "Mom, what I did was fine, it's kinda lame that you recombed it the same way!" OR "Mom, you are so banal (insipid, lacking in taste, style)."

When I asked him what he meant, the usual "It means boring!"

Such a lame excuse coming from my kindergartner, and there is no excuse for any child to think that what the mom does for him is always boring...yes it was a neat hairdo, but it is definitely appropriate for a child his age and for school. Have I become so momsy ...but momsy is good isn't it?

First Fast

Alhamdullillah, it was a great first fast today in a foreign land. I woke up at 3.30 am because Tahir had to leave for work at 4.30am. I warmed up the leftover chicken rice, and we just had a little bit of rice and chicken. There were still leftover chicken. After Tahir left, I couldn't sleep so I surfed the net until it was time for Subuh. I still couldn't sleep so I was on the laptop until it was time to wake Afzal up for school ...well, in fact he woke up himself just like five minutes before 6 am wet from his pee, and I got him to hit the showers. After Afzal left for school, I just lazed around the house figuring out what mess I should get in order today. Let the mess be! Felt like sleeping but it was sleep interrupted. Got a long distance phonecall. Surfed the net, did some laundry, cleaned the kitchen, do some other stuffs and prepare the stuffs to cook for break fast. I finally decided to make porridge, not bubur asyura but just my own variation of my mom's porridge recipe. I added a little bit of mince meat and prawns so that it felt like as if we're having bubur masjid for buka just like back in Singapore. Also, made beef steak too... those beef, potato and cabbage in chilli and tomato sauce best eaten with french loaf. We didn't have french loaf but after the porridge, I only manage a slice of bread with the beef steak. Both meals turned out quite nice despite the fact that I was not able to taste it. So nikmat!

Afzal gets a Certificate of Achievement

Though it is only on plain white copy paper, it certainly made his day knowing that he is the only one in class who received this.

WESTLAWN ELEMENTARY SCHOOL

CERTIFICATE OF ACHIEVEMENT

This award is hereby presented to

Afzal Muhammad

TIGERRIFIC STUDENT OF THE MONTH

For displaying excellent character traits, outstanding behavior,

leadership abilities and working welll with peers.

October 3, 2005

Ramadan begins tomorrow

Following the Islamic Society of Mobile, we are fasting tomorrow, 4th October 2005. Therefore, we will be sahur-ing later. Subuh or Fajr as it is called here is at 5.28 am and Break Fast or Maghrib is at 6.34 pm. Happy fasting to all...Selamat Berpuasa!

Afzal's DIBELS score

Posted at

http://afzalmom.multiply.com/journal/item/5

Afzal took these shots!

Good framing and composition! Of course this is not his first time handling the videocam but this time, he got his shots well-framed!

Telescope

Tahir bought this telescope from Walmart hoping to catch some stars and constellations, hoping to get his son to discover the solar system, to discover astronomy...and yes, he has yet to get it to work. Seriously, I haven't get to see anything through the lens yet. So we'll see when, and I really meant WHEN my dear husband will get this to work again...

The Trump Blog

Donald Trump has a blog... yes The Apprentice's Donald Trump.


http://donaldtrump.trumpuniversity.com/

Cooler weather

Cooler weather are expected in the days to come, as the cool air travels from north down to south of US. So expect chilly mornings and nights from Friday through the weekend. Got to standby our sweaters and light winter jackets...

The official day of Fall.

The official day of Fall is Thursday, 22 September 2005. Autumn has begin in some northern states with the leaves of trees changing to brown. I am looking forward to this.

However, a tornado watch is in effect due to Rita and I'm not looking forward to this, if it's coming to Mobile's way.

A New Life is Born

Amidst the wrath of nature, a new and beautiful creation is being born onto this planet. Muhammad Alman, the firstborn of Omel and Nan was delivered on 5th September at 2121 hours weighing 2.765 kg. Omel is Tahir's little sister. Yes, she has been the baby of the family and now she has a baby of her own. We hope all is well with this little cutie and to the proud parents... Congratulations!!! Welcome to many sleepless nights!!! But I'm sure you will feel heavenly blissful knowing that you have created this being from yourselves...cheers!!!

Rita has reached Category 5!!!

I just pray that God is merciful to everyone on this hurricane soil.

Rita is reaching Category 4 status

There is now mandatory evacuation for people living in Galveston, Texas. But what I find really heartbreaking are those evacuees from New Orleans who were brought to Houston, Texas and now had to be evacuated again. Just listening to the news makes me hurricane-weary, what's more those lives who are directly affected by them. Rita is said to reach the coast of Texas by Wed late night or Thurs morning. I'm sure Mobile will be hit by rain or downpour as well during the late week. If you watch the news, there are daredevils who would stand to watch the waves in the thunderstorm at the edge of the sea. The media would also go all out to capture the moment - big waves and wind hitting furiously at shore with at least one reporter braving it. I just hope they have good insurance on their own lives!

For more information, check the following website for updates;-

The Weather Channel - http://www.weather.com/

New Threat : Hurricane Rita

Enough said.

An ocean wave crashes over a sightseer in Key West, Florida, September 20, 2005 as Hurricane Rita brushes past the area. (AP Photo/J. Pat Carter)from http://www.comcast.net

Fatigue and the future

I have been so tired. Maybe it's the remnants of my jet lag. Otherwise I don't know what it is and I am definitely not p******* if that is what you think. Been sleeping and staying awake at all the wrong time.

It is coming to the end of summer but it is still hot outside and infested with insects. There is this bug that the people here called love bugs or something because there are always two of them stuck with each other. They come in twos. Mate for life!

Guess fall is creeping in soon as the new fall collections are out and it's clearance for the summer wear. Daytime hours is getting shorter as maghrib is more like 6.23 pm compared to 7.58 pm in June.

Afzal is back in school and been telling me about this boy who keep physically hurting him. This boy is not much bigger than Afzal. I have told his teacher but I guess she has not seen this chap doing anything yet. Even when we told Afzal to do something about it like telling Kevin off, or 'telling him that he does not want to play with him,' Afzal just do not want to do it. Afzal is not traumatised by the incidents but behaviours like slapping, pulling the ear and kicking is definitely not acceptable. I have to go to his school and observe myself then or even talked to this Kevin.

Oh btw, I have written a simple children's story in Malay and I have printed it out on powerpoint. No illustrations yet but maybe I'll draw myself. Any publishers out there who is interested?!

Anyway, I realised that though Afzal can speak fluent Malay, it is conversational. When I started formally teaching him Malay, he is stumped and he can only think of the words in English instead of Malay. It is because he has taken Mandarin since playgroup as we wanted him to learn the language as we can teach him Malay ourselves. However, since we are in the US now, we do not know any Mandarin, therefore we have to double up on the Malay for him. This is just some of the tough decisions that we parents make.

I've brought some Malay books that we bought in Johor recently when we went back home and I've also bought some Islamic books in English online for Afzal and ourselves. Hopefully, we can homeschool him on Malay and Islam, Insya Allah.

The origins of Hurricane names.

This article is from Ask Yahoo! at http://ask.yahoo.com/ask/20041105.html

The National Hurricane Center (NHC) has drawn up alphabetical lists of male and female names to be used as hurricane designations from now until 2009. Unfortunately, the NHC doesn't explain the methodology it used to come up with these names.
According to this comprehensive hurricane site, hurricanes began officially receiving names in 1950. For two years, they were stuck with standard call sign names -- Able, Baker, Charlie, Dog, etc. Between 1953 and 1978, for reasons we are unwilling to surmise, hurricane names were exclusively female. In 1979, the situation became more progressive, and male names were added to the mix.
Hurricanes only receive a name once their status is elevated from tropical storm. The names of a few particularly destructive hurricanes, such as 1992's Andrew, (and I would like to add Hurricanes Ivan and Katrina) have been permanently retired for reasons of sensitivity.
Why do hurricanes have names in the first place? According to the NHC, the use of "short, distinctive given names" is quicker and less subject to error than using latitude-longitude identification methods.

Katrina Aftermath in Mobile

An uprooted tree within the compound of our apartment crashed onto the gate. Though Mobile was not as devastated as New Orleans or Biloxi, Katrina did give the residents here a scare. We are thankful that we are back in Singapore when Katrina hit but for those Singaporeans who were still in Mobile, it was a wild gust of wind and thunderstorm on the night of Monday, Aug 29th. It was reported that the wind speed were 80 mph or 130 kmph. We returned to Mobile on the evening of September the 4th. And as our plane were moving over Texas and into Alabama, the change in the clouds and weather was significant. The sky from Dallas Fortworth Airport was clear and the clouds looked like little white shrubs sporadically scattered across the clear Dallas sky. But it was not so as the plane entered Mobile. It was as if the plane was moving into a kingdom of clouds... it was mountainous huge of swirly white and greyish clouds. It was like "kepulan kabu-kabu putih dan kelabu yang menggunung". When the plane entered the clouds, we could just see misty white stuff outside and as the plane was lowering its altitude, there was turbulent. It was pretty scary as we couldn't see much outside. There was slight rain too. When we drove back to our apartment, we could see fallen trees and damage billboards. As some traffic lights had been blown away, there was a police officer to help navigate traffic at affected road junctions. The pawn shop just outside our apartment had its roof blown away and the three gas stations at the junction were closed. We found out later that gasoline is a scarce commodity now and there is a cap of $20 for every pump. There was also a state of curfew in our area. Except for those who are working, everyone else has to be home from dusk till dawn (ie. 6pm) until further notice. Public schools in Mobile County are closed until September 12 so Afzal will be home until then. As I am writing this, the news from tv reported that the next hurricane - Hurricane Maria (of all name) is lurking in the Bermuda but the good news is Maria will not be heading towards land. However, they are taking caution to tropical storm Nate that is moving towards Florida again. It is definitely a Hurricane Depression in this region.

My neighbour Ida and the rest who were here during Katrina were without electricity for 2 and half days. This meant they were hot, in total darkness at night (except for some burning candles), fridge could not store food and they cannot use the stove or make hot water. Though they had water, it was noted that water had to be boiled in certain parts of Mobile. So for precautionary sake, they bought water from the supermarket during the first few days. Ming, a Thai housewife of one of my husband's colleague came to the rescue when she managed to collect some woods and make fire to warm food the first day after the hurricane. It's really survival at this time. Later on, the families bought themselves a barbecue grill and had to rely on grill food for that 2.5 days before electricity was restored. The halal store across the street were without electricity for 4 days and his frozen foods had to be thrown away. Business is really down. Even for Walmart in which we saw many foods not being stock up including their own plastic bags.

For Ida, it was definitely an event that she did not want to experience. For us, we are just thankful to God that we were back home in Singapore during that time. We hope that for the rest of our stay here, God will continue to protect us and the families who are seeking rezeki far away from home.

Some news of Hurricane Katrina in Mobile.

http://www.cnn.com/2005/WEATHER/08/30/katrina.alabama/index.html
http://www.cnn.com/2005/WEATHER/08/29/mobile/index.html

Venn and Graphs

What I like about the school is that they welcome parents with open arms. In fact, the principal, class teacher, parent and child signed a "contract" in which the signed individuals agree on the responsibilities each has and will work closely towards the mission statement of the school. Their newsletter encourages parents to come and visit the school, have lunch with their child and volunteer in the class or at school. So I have signed up to volunteer myself.

I visited Afzal for lunch last Friday and stayed in the class after that. Mrs Smith told me that she will be teaching them graphs... that will be interesting. I saw the pocket chart containing a square, circle and triangle. The children were asked to choose their favorite shape. Mrs Smith flashed cards that contain the children's names to see whether the children can identify their names ... a bit too simple if based on the Singapore system but for some children, this is their first time in a school environment. The children made their choices by putting their namecard on the pocket slot under their favorite shape. After everyone had done it, Mrs Smith went on to explain most and least, and how you can see it from the graphs. Then she moved on with their favorite letters A, B and C and went through the same routine.

I heard Mrs Smith explaining to the children that yesterday they learned about the Venn... that's marvellous I thought and so when we reached home, I asked Afzal to explain what was the Venn that he learned yesterday. I drew two overlapping circles but Afzal said no. He drew a circle and told me that all those who takes the car to and from school goes into that circle. Those who takes bus and other modes of going home are outside the circle. So he told me that he is outside the circle cos he takes the school bus. Asked him to explain more, and that is all he could tell me for now. But I liked what he is doing in school. They even have a review or reflective session in which the children are encouraged to 'write' something in their journal. Some children draw something, others doodle all over their book. I saw Afzal's journal. It was the first page and it contained some words that he already knew how to write by memory... words like boy, box, go, see etc...I didn't get to see all that he wrote but I'll get to take a peek at it one day.

Each of the kindergarten teachers has their own style and each of them does something a bit different for their own classes. I saw what another class did. The teachers pasted their works on the wall outside their classroom based on the book "If you take a mouse to school". There was a chart divided into two parts. On the left side "what mouse brought to school", and on the right side, "what we brought to school". The teacher circled the same things that mouse and the children brought to school and write the word "same". Besides language, the teachers were teaching a very basic maths concept, and I am impressed cos it looks fun and just the sort of things we should be doing.

In Farzana's grade 1 class, her teacher was teaching rhymes, but it's more so to get the children understand ending sounds. Farzana's mom, Sarina, was pleased too because she felt that the school goes a bit more in depth as compared to the "touch and go" situation back home. I'm sure there are pros and cons, but it's good to expose our children to their way of teaching as well. I also see a lot of language experience approach in the kindergarten and grade 1 classes. For Farzana's class, they read "The purple cow" and the children are encouraged to write about a purple animal that they have never seen before. Farzana wrote, "I never saw a purple cat."

Bcos the school is emphasising manuscript handwriting, Afzal's "l" and "u" have a little curved tail at the end now. After 5 days in school, I felt that he is writing much better, in terms of having all his letters on the line and the lowercase letters not going beyond the middle dotted line. I have never forced Afzal to write properly bcos I just want him to enjoy writing first. He seemed to be enjoying writing now and at home, we have been doing language experience approach rather than writing in workbooks. Afzal loves it because he wants to write stories as he plans to publish his books and open a bookstore in Australia. Yup his ambition now is to be a police officer, an author and a bookstore owner and mum is the cashier. Yeah...we've got things planned out, didn't we? While it's still burning hot, I am encouraging every single bit of writing experience that he wants to do :)

Books used in the K classes in the first week.

Miss Bindergarten Gets Ready For Kindergarten Author: Joseph Slate Illustrator: Asley Wolff

If You Take A Mouse To School
Author: Laura Numeroff
Illustrator: Felicia Bond

Organised Chaos

Organised chaos is how I would describe the early morning situation at school. Everyone enters by the side door that leads to the gym and cafeteria. Those who do not wish to eat breakfast or already had theirs at home head to the gym and those who are having breakfast will head to the cafeteria. The gym and cafeteria is just side by side and the entrance is nearest to the gym. The queue for breakfast is long and will continue pass the gym and through the door to the outside. At least, there is no flag-raising ceremony or anthem singing. Those in the gym had to sit quietly according to grade level and when they have enough students I suppose (because some of the teachers of the class have other duty to do and they don't take attendance at the gym), the staff in charge in the gym will get the students in line and one teacher or staff will lead the students to their grade classes crossing paths with the breakfast queue and that's when a lot of 'chaos' occurs. The 5 kindergarten classes are clustered together, so one teacher will bring all the kindergarten kids to their classes. And if their class teacher is there, they will go to their classroom. If not, they either wait outside their classroom and for those students who seemed clueless, they were all put into one class. The weird thing is the teachers do not make the students wear name tags. If the kids have name tags, at least, whoever is with them is able to identify their names or the class that they are supposed to be in. If the child is unsure, the staff brings him to each classroom and asked, "Is he yours?" So teacher will say "Oh yes" or "Ah, ah, no" and move on to the next class. So that's totally inefficient I thought. What if the teacher forgets the face? Especially when it was only like the second day of school. Sometimes a kid gets out of his line and gets lost, that's when there's more chaos. Once he or she starts crying, you don't get anything out from the child and he or she probably wants only his mommy and daddy. And there's no name tag to know which class the child is in.

The going home time...what I like which I think is great and Singapore can adopt. Walkers leave at 3.10 pm and go out through the front door. Aftercare and school bus will leave to the left exit of the school building and car pick up is on the right side. There are two lanes for the car pick up and when the car moves in, they will pass through a roundabout and wait by the side in two lanes. Each car will put the name of their child on a paperplate (they should also put the grade level) and put it on their windscreen. If it's a young child, the teacher herself will escort the child to the car. Parents are not allowed to leave their car (unless it's a rainy day and they need to bring the umbrella for their child). Once the child is loaded, the car moves off and the next car waits. The reason for the two lanes so that there is no bottle neck in case a child is not out yet. So at least one line can still keep moving. I think this is great because so often in Singapore, there are no car lanes and inconsiderate parents simply jammed up the roads and it can be very dangerous, not only for the children but for other road users.

For those leaving by bus, my son's teacher stick a yellow post-it with the bus no and paste a clear cellophane across the post-it on his t-shirt. One teacher will take all the kids who are going home by school bus and move to the exit for the bus. There are three buses, so there would be someone to ensure these kids take the right bus. The only thing is the number on the bus is too long...like 2000-83, 2004-35 etc. Thank goodness, there are only three schoolbuses and hopefully Afzal will not hop onto the wrong one.

The Yellow School Bus

That's Afzal's school bus and we were tailing it from behind after school. We missed the bus in the morning and we were not even late. The bus was supposed to be at the designated pick up point at 7.19 am and we were there at 7.15 am and yet the bus was early and didn't wait. But since we were ready to follow the bus to school so Tahir drove both Afzal and Farzana.

When we tailed the bus on the way home, the bus went through some bumpy route and it got my heart shaken a little as the bus tipped left and right when it went through a tiny lane. As a mother, I think if my husband is not working, he should definitely send and pick our son up. That looked quite precarious. But both Farzana and Afzal enjoyed the bus ride because I think it was a new and different experience for them. Afzal admitted that he enjoyed school better here than in Singapore...too much fun and no work...hmmm I don't know, but I'm glad he is happy. In fact, I think I missed him at home.

First Day At School!

It was the first day of the new school term. Both Afzal and Farzana are looking great in their white and beige uniform. Another milestone in the history of these kids. For Afzal, at least, while I was still lingering in his class, he actually told me,"Why are you still here, mummy?" That's a change from the usual whiny "I want my mummy in class" when I sent him to childcare in Singapore a few months back. Maybe it's the coming of age, maybe it's more fun here. At least, he is more independent now and is looking forward to school.

A new friend was made. I was surprised at the friendliness of the White girl. She actually mistook Farzana for her friend Helen and was embarrassed after the phototaking that Farzana was not Helen. But we made them friends. Farzana is one of Tahir's colleague daughter, and she is in grade 1 while Afzal is in kindergarten. That girl, I think her name is Casey or something, is from Grade 4. By the way, that cute little girl in blue is Sabrina, Farzana's little sis.

We came back during Afzal's lunchtime at 12.45pm. Afzal and a petite little girl named Hope were Mrs Smith's little helpers today. Hope was the first to stand in line and Afzal was made to stand by the door to let the other kids out. A lot of disciplining was going on as Mrs Smith mentioned that they have to get the students used to the routine. We headed to the cafeteria and though Afzal had brought his lunch pack, he still wanted to queue for the food. Since I've already informed Mrs Smith about his dietary limitations, we were there just to see what was the situation like. It may be tough but I think we just needed to educate the teachers and staff a little about our religious obligation and I expect that constant gentle reminders maybe needed.

We started by writing a letter to Mrs Smith, as if it was written by Afzal to introduce himself. It was more so to explain about how we write our names - I mean sometimes it's hard to explain that we don't have a first, middle and last name. Also, the fact that we have certain dietary limitations. We have taught Afzal about halal and non-halal food but just in case.

After getting their trayful of food, the children move to the designated tables and the serving was in fact quite large for these little kids. The works would include taco with meat sauce, some kind of colored rice, corn, cake, chips, choice of salad, peach, apple, juice and milk. After their meal, they were expected to put all thrash on the tray, wait for instructions, before they moved in one line to put their tray away, separating the fork into a "chute". Being kids, they were noisy, some eat, while some doesn't. Then it was loo time before they headed back to class. By the way, the Americans call toilets, restroom.

When the kids came in the morning, we had to fill up a form of how they were going home - by car, school bus, walk or aftercare. Today it was by car but we will get him on the school bus from tomorrow. And it's free. We do not have any school fees to pay as well except for a $5 registration and whatever amount we want to spend on school uniforms and materials. You can buy your uniforms from any departmental stores that sell them. So you can compare prices as well as the designs. Though the color is the same, the girls' uniforms have different styles. Some girls may prefer to wear skirts, others may prefer skorts, pants, jumper, pinafore etc or it's up to you if you want everything. There's not much choices for boys though.

Each grade level has a different material list that includes scissors, crayon, washable markers, composition books, hand sanitizer, disinfectant spray, paper towels, tissue box etc and so far we have spent about $75 on materials and uniforms. We think it's a decent amount bearing in mind that there are no school or transport fees. Lunch is $1.50 unless you are given discount because of your family situation which we doubt we will get that. Also, you don't have to buy lunch if you bring lunch or you can pay 35 cents for a packet of milk or something else that you want. Breakfast... yes breakfast is provided unless you come to school by 7.40am and it's a flat rate of 0.60cents unless you are under financial aid. Formal school starts at 8.20 am until 3.20pm. So that's the gist of my little kid's life in a public school here...

Barnacle Part 2

Me : You are going to school tomorrow.

Son : Is there a lot of work?

Me : This week, just play. Next week, there is work.

Son: Oh Barnacle!

Me : What did you say?

Son : Oh Barnacle!

Me : What does it mean?

Son : It means I don't want to do that.

Barnacle!

Scenario 1
Me : "Afzal, make sure you put your books on the table!"
Son: "Oh Barnacle!"

Scenario 2
Me: "Afzal, go and bathe."
Son: "What a Barnacle!"


Oh what the thing is this Barnacle! It sounded like some bad word, and I knew where the son got it from. Spongebob Squarepants! That yellowish mustard sponge from Bikini Bottom. And I really doubt that Afzal knew what it meant but he used the expression quite convincingly. And here's the meaning of Barnacle from Merriam-Webster:

also called Cirripede , any of a majority of the 1,000 species of marine crustaceans of the subclass Cirripedia. Adults of cirripedes other than barnacles are internal parasites of crabs, jellyfish, starfish, and some other marine invertebrates. They have no popular name. As adults, typical barnacles are covered with calcareous plates and are cemented, head down, to rocks, pilings, ships' hulls, …

Hmm, by saying that, it means "What a parasite!", thus associating me with the Adult Cirripede - an internal parasite. Personally, it's does not sound too harmful but I think he should be made known of what it could mean or lead to. Should I wait till he is slightly older to explain...any comments?

A Hot Summer

We went to the swimming pool yesterday, only the second time since we came. All the kids were enjoying themselves... and all 9 kids in the pool were Singaporean. No one else except us. The summer can be really hot and though we were there at 5.30 pm, the heat was really eating into my skin. Maghrib is only at 7.38 pm meaning it's long daylight, but it's getting shorter... I guess it will be good for us if it's shorter daylight when Ramadan comes, especially being a first timer in a foreign land. I can't imagine how soon Ramadan and Idilfitri will be... and before I know it, it will be time for us to pack and head home...

Looking for that holistic word or words...

Before I rattle about the above, congratulations to my dearest friend Seri and of course Greg who just had their first bouncy baby boy, Dayan Tay. She called me all the way from Singapore to tell me that it was one of the biggest challenges of her life. It's amazing how some women have easy pregnancy tales to tell while others like me and Seri, doesn't. And I'm sure it's just the start of a long road ahead albeit an exciting and nerve-wrecking ones for the new trio.

That's what been getting me these days... for the lack of an all-encompassing word or holistic word that best describes what we, as parents, are doing for our child(ren).

When we talk about homeschooling our child, that's like being a real teacher and creating a classroom-like atmosphere in the home with your only student and teaching all the subjects (and more) that are taught in school at home . But when your child goes to school and you still do some activities with him at home, what do you call that? I mean I don't supervise any homework for now cos there's none but I do activities that I created myself or in which I feel Afzal should be learning. And even when we are doing the home activities, there's lots of disciplining going on as well. Besides "teaching" or "playing" with him, I'm constantly "nagging", "making him conscious of the consequences of his actions", "giving alternative views and opinions", "telling him what's right and wrong", "inculcate in him what's morally right"...blah, blah, blah and then there is the religious aspect that I'm trying to instil in him, "before you eat, let's say this doa", "before you read your book, let's read this doa", "what do you say when you are full?" etc etc and of course I also would like him to be able to speak, read and write Malay, and if he could also dabble with Mandarin and yadda, yadda, yadda.......so what is the "holistic term" that describes what I am doing with my child?

Guess that's the whole crux of the matter. We are parents and we are parenting our child the best we know how and the best we could...including teaching him his abcs, phonics, maths, general knowledge, his mother-tongue and his culture, his religion, what's right, what's wrong, say thank you and please, asking for orders over the counter, paying money and getting the right change, sleeping in his own bed in his own room etc etc and for new mommies, things that may seem simple like breastfeeding is a whole new learning experience for both mother and child which may turn out great or totally screwed (like mine), and for toddlers even peeing right or not peeing in their pants is a great deal of learning, educating, parenting... aren't these all part of home educating and parenting and schooling? ... so what's the fuss am I kicking? Perhaps Greg, yes that's Seri's hubby, described it best when he said, "I'm from the University of Life". Wouldn't that be something you want to give your child as well? The University of Life. Think about it.

Me and my new school uniform

What can I say? Don't I just look cool in this?